[QUEST] Sic Semper Tyrannosaur


Level 1
May 15, 2019
Sauron looked down at the paper that had washed down the storm drain and into the sewer. He could not believe it, luck had finally struck! After all that clambering about being the next step in the evolution of humanity, he quickly realized that he was still a homeless dinosaurman with nowhere to go, and an empty stomach. But this, this.... Professor Flandiddly? He was offering a substantial reward for aid in this monumental of a task as finding some old corpse in a tomb. Whatever, that's probably a very simple and easy task.

Getting up, he looked over at the hobo he had transformed into a dinosaurman and nodded approvingly, and told him that he was going out for a few days, maybe a week or two to go and hopefully receive some big buck cash that he could spend on something nice, like a couch. Or maybe a subscription to HBO? He did so enjoy that Game of Thrones show, and was very curious to how it would all be neatly wrapped in a little bow for the end. Oh well, questions for later now that he had an idea of what to do when he actually had money.

Getting up, he looked at himself in the shards of a mirror that had been knocked down within the past few days and he realized that he was already looking his best. Torn jeans, check. No shirt, check. Jumping over the sewer waters, he grabbed the ladder and quickly scrambled on up and out of the manhole into the streets above, expanding his winged arms in all his terrible glory to announce his presence! And... Nothing. Again, no one reacted at all to him. Like he was old news, or just ordinary. As though he were as mundane as the raccoons used to be before he transformed them into perfect saurion creations.

With a simple, "Bah!" he left and slithered his way to the address the flyer had given, clutching his glowing crystal scepter of SCIENCE as he went. Finally, after about an hour of traversing the mostly oddly redesigned New York City, he found his way and knocked on the door of the professor. The professor's home was very large and appeared to made out of simple clay bricks, with a massive steel door in the center. After a few minutes of shuffling and studying the architecture of the building, the door cracked open and a very thin, bald man looked out the door and at the final stage of human evolution.

"Are, are you here for the job offer?" the old man, presumably Professor Flandiddly asked.

"Yes, I'm here to help with the expedition." Sauron replied, studying the man with great care to not underestimate the weak and feeble.

"Just to be sure, you're here for that job? The one involving the tyrant King Kayzer's tomb?"

"Yeeeessssss." Sauron hissed out, getting annoyed by such a feeble man of science.

"Okay, okay, I just had to make sure," the professor relented, "some people are coming by asking about another job for the man across the street. The come wearing strips of leather and they have clone noses strapped into their mouths." The old man gives a slight shudder at these memories, while Sauron is just confused. Does eating a clown count as cannibalism? He ponders to himself, for clearly they are a different species than human. Obviously alien in origin. But why the leather? Questions for later.

The door closed as chains were released, allowing the door to open fully. As the rusted metal door slowly swung inwards, the future of humanity strode forth, ducking his head down as to not hit his crest on the roof of the doorway. He looked over at the old man and without a massive door in the way, he could fully see his new employer.

The old man was talking about something or other, but that didn't matter as his grey beard kept on flapping about, moving independently of his jaw as he spoke. But that oddity didn't even compare to what the rest of his being was. Long, lanky, his form nearly inhuman with how slender it was. His torso was covered in what appeared to be a stereotypical explorer's garb that would be seen on children's television, khakis. The weird, stereotypical victorian era British explorer khakis, including the poofy pants and the high socks. Thankfully, he was missing the hat, although Sauron doubted that he would be missing it for long.

"Do you accept the payment offered...?" Flandiddly asked, slowly, noticing that Sauron wasn't paying attention to this very crucial detail, and probably hoping to take advantage of this fact later when the mission was all said and done.

"What? Oh, yes. Yes. Whatever it is." Sauron replied, eager to get the journey started, in all honesty was didn't care what it was he was doing, he was just trying to kill time while also making enough money to fund his search to the Savage Lands and gather more of his SCIENCE crystals. Checking the charge on his current one, he noted that he didn't have too many blasts left. Hopefully, he wouldn't need to use anymore power on this trip. But on this trip, who knows what sacrifices might have to be made.

Professor Flandiddly held out his hand to shake on the agreement, and Sauron slowly took his own hand out, and grasped at the repulsive, smooth skin of the human. How it sickened him to touch such a pathetic, less evolved species.

"Excellent," Flandiddly said slowly, reaching over to where the hat resided, of course he had to wear such a stupid hat, of course. That's just how the universe worked around here.

The deal was struck, and they began to move out of the city to find this so called "Lost Tomb of King Kayzer" in the great wastes of the planet beyond the relative safety of the city of Markov.
(996 words so far)