V Blood and Water

Dr. McNinja · Sep 22, 2021

“HIYA!”

The veritably ancient carriage creaked loudly, as if to cry out in pain as it stumbled over another rough patch of road. The chocobos pulling it grunted in solidarity. Blythe Pellbrook winced at the thought of having to make repairs to the cart. The poor thing had a tendency to crumble at even the slightest of pressures, and the chocobos were in full gallop today. Still, Blythe lingered on the thought.

Anything to stop thinking of the rubbery, rotting stench leaking out of her stomach. The scent of a drowned man.

Anything to stop thinking about the festering brand of her older brother burning through her flesh.

“HIYA!” Garrick cried again, with a crack of his watery whip. Mama tried to wrap her healing vapors around Blythe’s wound again, but the cart rumbled, making the cloud quiver as it slid from one side of Blythe’s abdomen to the other.

“Steady the cart, Garrick!” Mama hollered. She immediately returned to her soft voice, addressing Blythe. Mama stroked her daughter’s blond hair, moving it out of the little girl’s eyes. “Hold on, girl. You’re a strong one.”

The night was cold, but Blythe couldn’t stop sweating. Oswin wiped her brow again with his handkerchief, flashing another reassuring smile.

Blythe looked out the window wordlessly, too weak to thank Oswin. This was the farthest Blythe had ever been from home, though she was sure her older brothers had ventured further for training. The rolling hills were a quiet shade of lavender, the first wisps of sunlight sighing onto the horizon. The trees began to grow taller, yet more pleasant. The trees back home stretched for the clouds as if they were the hands of starving children, begging for salvation, their withered branches cracked and deformed under their own weight. But these trees were pretty.

“Where are we going, Mother?” Garrick shouted behind him, “We aren’t even heading towards Arcadia.”

“Just shut up and drive the damn cart!” Aldrich bellowed, “She’s getting worse.”

Mama shot Aldrich a glare, but didn’t yell at him. That was probably scarier than anything else that was happening to Blythe.

“The normal doctors can’t help her,” Mama shouted back, “But there’s a specialist who can.”

“And what sane man would be awake at this time of night?” Garrick grumbled beneath his breath.

The cart shuddered again as it roared past a stone slab. Blythe seemed to be the only one to notice. In her last moments of consciousness, Blythe tried to remember all those reading lessons she did with Mama. What did that sign say?

Dr. McNinja
General Physician
“We don’t hire night janitors.”

The cart released one, final creak of resignation as Garrick pulled the lever to brake the poor thing. The chocobos shook their heads in displeasure, the one on the left almost immediately collapsing to rest its tired legs. There was a dreamlike quality to this place, which betrayed the seriousness of the emergency. Something about fluorescent lights flushing your face at the break of dawn fills you with a sense of calm. After all, it was rare to find a building in the rather rural plains, let alone one with windows that let out a blinding, lifeless shade of yellow.

Ignoring the fascinating aesthetic of this 21st century clinic in a medieval landscape, Aldrich and Oswin threw open the carriage doors. Aldrich sprinted forward for the front door as Mama grasped tightly onto Blythe’s limp body with both arms, afraid to let go. Mama rushed after her oldest son, Oswin and Garrick close behind.

“We need a doctor!” Aldrich shouted, having kicked open the glass and steel door.

The Pellbrook children looked around in fascination. They were standing in a completely empty reception area. The floors and ceilings were lined with dull white linoleum, and the plaster walls were cheaply painted to look like wood. Steel beams were hanging from the ceiling, the insides carved out to house bulbs of absolutely stunningly bright light. The boys got headaches just from looking up. Garrick almost bumped into a bench of steel and cheap, blue leather.

Mama Pellbrook, confused by why her children stopped running, shouted, “Get out the damn way!”

Aldrich, alarmed, stepped to the side to let Mama rush forward, still gripping onto Blythe bridal-style. The Pellbrook boys snapped out of their reverie and ran after her.

Mama seemed to know where she was going. She turned left, entering a short corridor. Of the two pine doors at the end, she kicked down the one to the right, which was helpfully labeled “Physician”.

Inside, they found a man who appeared to be eating a bagel, despite his face being completely covered by a mask. The room looked much like the reception area they were just in. The left and right walls were lined with a cornucopia of grey plastic cupboards. The back wall was instead occupied with an uncomfortable-looking bed, wrapped in the same blue leather from outside. One sheet of paper, as long as it was thin, laid almost uselessly on top of the bed.

“Oh!” the doctor said, “Ariel Pellbrook. What a pleasant surprise- And children! Goodness, you have a full litter of-“

The physician’s eyes seemed to land on Blythe’s pale and limp body, which Mama slammed down on the paper-leather bed. Mama turned to the man, somehow glaring desperately.

“Please,” Mama gasped, “Help her.”

The man hesitated for one second. In the next moment, the bagel seemed to vanish as the man (who seemed to have instantaneously donned some blue latex gloves) drew bandages and some tiny steel tools.

“What happened to her?” the man said.

“Who the hell is this supposed to be?” Garrick asked incredulously. The physician seemed.. disappointingly normal, except for the strange mask.

“My name is Dr. McNinja,” the man snapped back, “I’ll be your doctor for the evening. I feel like that was pretty obvious. Now…”

Dr. McNinja took a pair of scissors and, in an impossibly deft motion, widened the hole in Blythe’s tunic, revealing the full nature of the injury. A green rot fizzled and writhed around her wound, as if a thousand tiny insects were crawling underneath her skin. Yet, despite how chaotically the rot seemed to twist, they never ventured outside of what was clearly a brand: a circle with a tidal wave inside.

“…what the hell happened to her?” Doc repeated.

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Dr. McNinja · Sep 23, 2021

One hour and twenty minutes later, Blythe was… well, okay. She felt little more than a numb tongue and an intensely itchy feeling on her stomach. The platinum blonde child unhappily sipped on the straw to drink more of the sludgy concoction that Dr. McNinja had given her. It was in a smooth orange plastic cup, which Blythe thought looked nice. Her legs swung back and forth on the cold leather bed as she tried to subtly scratch her rapidly healing wound.

Blythe was a delightful little thing. Despite what must’ve been incredibly traumatizing, she was taking it like a champ. The first she did when she woke up was grin at Doc’s apparently humorous visage. And Doc knew for a fact that the drink was repulsive, even with the copiously sweet orange juice mixed in. Even most grown adults couldn’t bear to drink the whole thing. Still, she was dutifully sipping while looking around Doc’s office.

“That really wasn’t that bad,” Garrick commented from behind Dr. McNinja.

“Well, no, it was,” the physician corrected, “It was very lucky I happened to have some spare cockatrice eggs in the fridge. Works wonders on necrotic water spells.”

“Why do you have so many cockatrice eggs?” Aldrich asked.

Doc sighed. “There was a mass petrification last week, and when you don’t have an exact census of the nearby villages, you pack a couple spare ingredients.”

“No, I mean…” Aldrich paused. “How did you get them?”

This question seemed to perplex the physician.

“You know,” he finally replied, awkwardly miming a karate chop, “Ninja stuff. I don’t understand the question.”

Doc sized up the Pellbrooks in his office as he searched for the next medication. Ariel was sleepily watching Blythe. She hadn’t slept at all since she arrived, unlike her sons, and the adrenaline was clearly starting to wear off. Squat but muscular, Ariel looked like someone had condensed the unbridled rage of a drill sergeant and put it inside an already angry Italian housewife. But Doc imagined Ariel could look quite sweet if she wasn’t so intimidating. Her brown-grey hair cascaded in long curls over her lightly wrinkled face. Perhaps she was so weary because of the sheer weight of the bags under her eyes.

Her eldest was Aldrich. Though he was 19, Aldrich insisted that he was “almost 20.” He hadn’t once lowered his chin since he arrived, preferring to look down his nose at everything. Doc could almost laugh at how much posturing the boy did. There was a carefully crafted air of heroism about him, from his ever-broadening shoulders to his permanently stoic face. Even his biology seemed to reinforce this illusion, from his sharp and rectangular jawline, to his tanned but otherwise flawless skin. His auburn hair was naturally neat and straight, and parted to the side in an orderly fashion. Despite his arrogant stance (and his abrupt entrance), however, Aldrich was otherwise polite and a surprisingly competent nurse. All in all, he seemed like a good kid.

Doc couldn’t say the same for his younger brother, Garrick. What an asshole. Garrick’s hair was brighter than Aldrich’s, almost a fiery red, which matched the color of the spattering of freckles that speckled his cheeks. His face was round and red, like a kettle about to explode, or a hyperventilating bulldog. God, what an asshole. He second-guessed everything that Doc was doing, and not in any helpful way. When Doc asked him to step aside, the boy seemed to take it as a personal offense. McNinja got the impression that Garrick was just itching for a reason to punch him in the face.

Oswin, the youngest boy, didn’t leave much of an impression on Doc. He had the darkest hair of the children, a shade of brown that was dark enough to be mistaken for black. Also unlike his brothers, Oswin had pale skin as cold as snow. His features were sharp like Aldrich’s, but in a different way. Aldrich looked sculpted, but Oswin looked carved; while Aldrich looked like he was built from the ground-up to look sturdy, Oswin looked like he had been roughly cut from a stone. He was very quiet, but also proved to be an excellent assistant.

With a gentle series of clicks, Dr. McNinja gathered a series of vials for a blood test. There was something about Blythe that just wasn’t sitting right with him.

“Mrs. Pellbrook, I’m going to need to take some of her blood.”

Ariel seemed startled. Whether it was because of what Doc said or because she had just woken up, Doc wasn’t sure.

“Why?”

“It’s for a test,” Dr. McNinja explained, smiling with his eyes, “Just to make sure everything’s okay.”

Doc waited for Ariel’s approval. Blythe looked like she wanted to shake her head, but she too looked at her mother.

“Do what you need to,” Ariel grunted.

McNinja turned to Blythe, silently asking for her permission as well.

“Okay,” Blythe said quietly.

“Great!” Doc said, “You’re very brave! It’s just going to take a few seconds.”

Doc started gently slapping at the inside of Blythe’s elbow, searching for the artery, and rubbed the spot with an alcohol swab. He missed the days when a nurse would do this. He was technically qualified, but he hadn’t actually needed to take a blood test in a very long time.

He definitely didn’t remember it being so difficult to find a pulse.

Doc cleared his throat and warned, “This is going to sting a little, okay?”

Blythe yelped as the syringe pierced her skin. Her brothers all jumped up in defense, apparently readying themselves to fight McNinja. The physician gave Ariel an inquisitive look. Ariel, in turn, grunted at her sons. The boys sat down slowly.

“Actually, it might be helpful if we cleared the room a bit,” Doc said to Ariel, “Getting a little stuffy in here. You can stay, of course, but maybe your sons could..?”

Ariel nodded. Wordlessly, Aldrich, Garrick and Oswin left the room.

“Tell me about your brothers, Blythe,” Doc said, trying to distract Blythe from the feeling of blood being drawn.

“So how old are you, Blythe?” Doc asked, pulling out a syringe.

Blythe looked at Ariel, who nodded tiredly. The little girl looked Doc in the eyes, slightly intimidated.

“Nine,” Blythe responded.

“Nine years old!” Doc responded, “A good age.”

He paused as he unscrewed the first vial from the needle. He looked back up at Blythe as he screwed in the second vial.

“Your brothers are very protective of you,” Doc said.

Blythe winced again, but nodded. “Mm-hmm.”

“Who’s your favorite?”

Blythe paused, then smiled a little.

“Well, Aldrich is the oldest,” the girl responded, meeting Doc’s eyes to look away from the syringe. “He’s training to be a soldier. He takes care of us when Mama goes away for work.”

Blythe leaned in and giggled into Doc’s ear, “But he’s not a very good cook.”

Doc chuckled as he prepared the third vial. “So is Aldrich your favorite?”

Blythe’s expression darkened. Dr. McNinja blinked a few times, unsure of what line he had just crossed.

“No,” Blythe stammered.

Doc lowered his eyes, deciding not to push the matter. He unscrewed the third vial and put in the fourth.

“I see you finished your drink. How are you feeling?”

“Okay,” Blythe said, “A little itchy.”

“Remember, no scratching.”

“Mm-hmm.”

Dr. McNinja frowned as he looked at the fourth vial. It wasn’t filling up. Well, he supposed he didn’t need it. Not like Blythe was going to have diabetes.

“Alright, all done,” Doc said, putting a gauze over the syringe and gently pulling it. “Pick a band-aid!”

As Blythe perused the various cartoon band-aids in store, Dr. McNinja gave Ariel a grim look. Ariel returned it, seemingly knowing what Doc was thinking. Wordlessly, Doc put the band-aid on the inside of Blythe’s elbow.

Ariel stood up and stretched. “Alright, girl, why don’t you go to the boys. Let them know the doctor and I are going to be talking for a second.”

Blythe nodded happily, and scampered off. Doc and Ariel locked eyes. They held the silence for a moment.

“So?” Ariel finally said.

“Can’t be sure,” Doc replied, “I understand your family has a natural affinity for water magic.”

Ariel nodded. “The Pellbrook women have always had a way with the river.”

“So you know this is an unusual reaction,” Doc said with a low voice, “Necrotic water magic doesn’t tend to… linger like that.”

“That’s why I came here,” Ariel muttered, “That’s why you took her blood?”

Doc shrugged. “She should be fine for now. Cockatrice eggs really do work well. But I think it’d be best if I examined her more closely. Just to cover our bases. We don’t have any other patients right now, so if you want to wait around, I can have results for you by this afternoon.”

Ariel nodded. “Our carriage is probably dinged up like hell, anyway. Do you mind if we collect some wood from the area?”

Doc grimaced. “I mean, feel free, but uh… The woods outside my office are SUPER haunted, and I’m not going to be able to help.”

“We’ll manage.”

“Alright,” Dr. McNinja said, “Well, I’ll let you know what’s up. Magic is so unreliable anyway, maybe it was just the spell doing something weird. So chances are, it’s nothing serious.”

***

Less than four minutes later, Doc was staring at the smoking Petri dish, with what used to be a drop of Blythe’s blood sample. He sighed deeply.

“God dammit,” Doc mumbled, “It’s vampires.”

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Dr. McNinja · Sep 27, 2021

The morning sun was just starting to turn the sky into a more reasonable shade of blue. So much had happened in the span of a couple hours, Dr. McNinja mused. Right now, Ariel sat in the plastic chair in front of him. Her legs had lost all their strength, and she was resting her head against her hands.

“The good thing is we caught it early,” Doc said with practiced professionalism, “Necromantic vampirism is treatable in the early stages. With some luck, Blythe will make a full recovery in two weeks’ time.”

Ariel sat in continued stunned silence. Doc cleared his throat.

“Now, the treatment itself can be quite… difficult to arrange. As you might expect, necromantic vampirism is a bit of a fickle ritual thing, so to treat it requires the same amount of-“

“Wait,” Ariel interrupted.

Dr. McNinja stopped talking. He set down his clipboard and, almost instantaneously, was holding a hot mug of tea instead.

“Here, hold this,” Doc said kindly, “Even if you don’t want any, just breathe in the fumes. It’ll help calm you down.”

Ariel Pellbrook shot him a glare, but eventually took the mug. She took a deep breath, and her nostrils flared as her brow relaxed a bit.

“Could you explain-“ Ariel paused briefly, before continuing with shut eyes, “Could you explain what necromantic vampirism is?”

Dr. McNinja nodded. He unfurled a laminated chart and pressed it against the back wall of his office, flattening it so Ariel could see.

“As you know,” Doc said, pinning the chart as he spoke, “The Crossroads is a smorgasbord of various universes and cultures. That actually means there are a LOT of different iterations of the same thing here. It does make my job a little more difficult, I won’t lie.”

Now that it was fully open, Ariel could see that the chart was a series of illustrations of someone going through a transformation. The top was labeled “Stages of Esoteric Acroamasica Vampirization”. Whatever the hell that meant.

Doc continued, “But the basic principle of necromantic vampirism is that it’s a side effect of a spell that was cast to drain the patient’s life force. You know how most vampires turn others by biting them and drinking their blood? Similar, but it’s like a…”

Doc wiggled his fingers. “A metaphorical vampire bite. Literal vampires involved, though. Which brings us the good news. Because of its similarities to SFV, Imperial Vampirism and its Nosferatic strains, all we need is a piece of her forefathers’ bones, and the blood of her enemy. Basically, half a resurrection. Well, after we drain her blood.”

The physician pointed to the leftmost illustration in the chart, a man who looked like he had a fever.

“We’re still in Stage One EAV,” Doc continued, “She’s not showing any symptoms yet, but she’ll start experiencing high temperatures and possibly some vomiting. In fact, we’re as early as can be. We have four days before she enters Stage Two… which is death.”

Ariel’s eyes widened, but Doc interrupted her before she could say anything.

“Yeah, that sounds bad, but it’s not.” Doc pointed at the many other stages in the chart. “In fact, she needs to go through a natural death process. We just need to interrupt the venom’s regeneration effect with our own.”

Dr. McNinja pointed at the diagram for Stage Two, a corpse with fangs. “It’d be best to acquire the ingredients for her before she enters Stage Two.”

“Four days,” Ariel mumbled.

“Four to six, actually. Depends how long the patient remains in Stage Two EAV. Four is safer, for obvious reasons.”

Ariel sighed. “Is there any treatment for the later stages?”

“Not really,” Doc admitted, “At Stage 3, patients may seem normal, if a bit eccentric. But at that point, whether the patient realizes it or not, they are a vampire. The sunlight, the garlic, the works. Stage 4 begins about a week after they’ve fed for the first time. But hopefully, we’ll nip it at Stage 2 and be done with it.”

Ariel didn’t respond for a while. Dr. McNinja cleared his throat, and started rolling up the charts. Maybe this was too much for her.

“Mrs. Pellbrook, how did you say Blythe was wounded, again?” Doc asked.

Ariel swallowed hard before responding. “Some outlaws raided our home while we were asleep. They were going to kill us in our sleep. Blythe was always a slight sleeper, though.”

Doc nodded. “We’re lucky that nobody else got injured.”

“Not lucky,” Ariel said, “Prepared. But clearly not prepared enough.”

Dr. McNinja looked at the tiny woman, who was gritting her teeth so hard Doc feared they might snap.

“Did you see who attacked your daughter?” Doc said, leaning on a nearby counter, “We need to hunt down the attacker.”

Ariel gave Doc another hard look, a look cold enough to send chills down his spine. The mother seemed to struggle with her next sentence for a while, as if she was rolling the words around in her mouth before spilling them out.

“It was Peter,” Ariel finally spat, “My second eldest boy.”

Dr. McNinja’s brow crinkled and he looked at the ceiling.

“Oh, dip,” Doc mumbled.

***

After some more coercion, Dr. McNinja finally got the full story.

Peter Pellbrook Jr. had taken off in the night about a month ago. Though his family searched for him, there was no sign of foul play. Some of his belongings had also vanished, and his bed was neatly made. There was a note on his bed, in his handwriting. The note talked about how he was going to make a name for himself out there. That he’d met a vampire who spoke of riches.

One week after Peter’s disappearance, Ariel started hearing from the others in the market about a new band of vagrants wandering around the countryside. They eyed Ariel warily as they mentioned that one of them seemed to be a proficient Hydromancer. After all, even the Pellbrook boys had a natural affinity for water magic.

A little less than two weeks after his disappearance, Ariel heard Blythe cry out in the dead of night. She immediately rushed to her little girl’s aid, but was too late. The cloaked attacker had already branded her with the necrotic spell, and leapt out of the window. Several young men were sprinting from the house. Ariel’s sons mobilized and secured the farmstead with some basic warding spells while Ariel herself prepared the carriage. Her jewelry box was raided, and the pantry was completely empty.

“And I remembered Martha Callahan mentioned you last week,” Ariel said, “Said you’d cured her son’s… special condition.”

“Paul Bunyan’s Disease,” Doc explained, “Surprisingly common where I come from.”

“Well, I don’t particularly trust city folk. I guess you ARE a city man, but still glad I found you.”

Doc nodded solemnly. He paused respectfully before continuing, “Do you know where your son might be now?”

Ariel shrugged. “They headed south. Don’t know how far.”

Doc looked at his map of Erde Nona. “Makes sense. There’s a system of caves there. Perfect for housing a vampire, as long as you keep the place neat.”

Ariel gave Doc a quizzical look.

“If you scatter things on the floor, vampires need to stop and count them,” Doc explained, “Pro tip, by the way. Just keep a pocketful of rice and you can distract a vampire for up to ten minutes.”

Doc leaned on his desk for a bit.

“One thing doesn’t make sense, though,” he mused aloud, “Given what we know, it’s pretty clear that Peter is the vampire in the crew. I wonder how he got inside without being invited.”

Ariel gave Doc another quizzical look. The physician sighed exasperatedly.

“Vampires can’t enter liminal spaces, like doors or windows, without being invited in by an established resident. Does nobody read my Vampire Awareness pamphlets?”

Ariel squinted. “It doesn’t matter. We know it was Peter.”

Doc flinched, then nodded. “Yes, the signs seem to point that way. That makes this simple. All I need to do is go to the caves, draw some of Peter’s blood, and Bob’s your uncle. Do you have any of her ancestors’ remains?”

Ariel’s expression darkened. She starting looking at something behind Doc, far away. “Her father.”

Doc swallowed hard. God, this was depressing. “My condolences.”

After another moment, Doc sighed. “Yeah, so we need just a few shavings of Mr. Pellbrook’s bones. I know it must be… difficult-“

“It’s fine,” Ariel said, “Whatever it takes. You’re going to be fine going alone?”

“Oh, yeah,” Doc scoffed jovially, “I may not look it, Mrs. Pellbrook, but I’m actually quite an accomplished vampire hunter.”

The squat woman looked Doc in the eye with no small amount of doubt. “And how comfortable are you with killing?”

Doc smiled as reassuringly as an assassin could. “I’ve killed before, but I try to keep everyone alive.”

After a moment, Doc explained, “You know, vampires aren’t actually intrinsically evil. Vampirism is a disease, and vampires are just victims of that disease. There are some great recovery programs for fledgling vampires that help them integrate into society. It might be too late for Peter to be cured, but I can help him-“

“You misunderstand,” Ariel said, standing up. Her glare seemed to bore holes into Doc’s eyes. “I want you to kill him.”

Doc blinked, bewildered. “You want me… to kill… your son.”

“I want you to kill the vampire piece of shit that attacked my only daughter,” Ariel insisted, her words dripping with malice, “I want you to make him suffer for betraying me.”

“Surely Peter didn’t want to become a vampire-“

“I don’t care what Peter wants!” Ariel snapped, “What matters is what he did. And what he did was betray his mother, his own kin, then come back a few weeks later to try and kill his baby sister.”

Dr. McNinja swallowed hard. “Mrs. Pellbrook, I don’t feel comfortable with-“

“Is it money?” Ariel continued, “I know how you ninja work. I assure you that won’t be an issue.”

“My ninja services are purely recreational,” Doc said, cringing a little at how that made him sound. “I don’t take killing jobs.”

“Then what’s stopping you? Is it pity?” Ariel scoffed. “Do you pity me, McNinja?”

Doc didn’t say anything.

“Don’t pity me,” Ariel continued, “Or Peter. Pity the people he’s turned into more of those monsters. The ones who can’t afford your treatment, or were too late. Pity them… and kill that little shit. Promise me, McNinja!”

Doc hadn’t even noticed that he was standing and instinctively stepping backwards. Ariel’s expression softened.

“Promise me,” Ariel said, her voice suddenly very quiet.

Dr. McNinja swallowed hard again. He finally met Ariel’s eyes. Doc couldn’t begin to explain the amount of pain in them. He certainly couldn’t explain the swell of emotions that overcame him, which prompted him to answer thus:

“I promise.”

Ariel visibly relaxed.

“Thank you,” she said. Exhausted, she crossed her arms as if to hug herself, and started to walk out of Dr. McNinja’s office.

The mother turned to Doc before she left. “I’ll be at my home with Blythe in the meantime. To find the bones you need.”

Dr. McNinja was too stunned to protest. Ariel wordlessly left, the click of her boots growing quiet as she moved down the hallway.

Doc looked at the katana scabbard hung up on his wall. He had stayed away from fighting since he got to the Crossroads. And now he was going to break his sabbatical… to kill a mother’s son.

He thought about his own mother.

After a few moments of packing what he needed, Doc heard the rattling of a carriage outside. He quietly cursed at himself for forgetting to charge Ariel. Whatever. He had to assume she didn’t have the money for this.

Doc exited his office. He didn’t have most of his gear, but it was fine. He had packed some rice, brought his garlic spray, and some stakes. He should be fine-

Dr. McNinja stopped in his tracks, staring Aldrich in the eye.

“I thought you went home,” Doc said.

Aldrich slapped Garrick, who had been sleeping in one of the waiting room benches. The younger brother woke up with a loud snort.

“Mama wanted us to accompany you,” Aldrich announced, “Don’t worry about us. We won’t slow you down.”

Doc squinted at the two boys. Aldrich’s tone was clear - this was not a negotiation. Garrick glared back as if daring McNinja to decline.

“You understand what your mother asked me to do?” Doc said.

“You’re going to take some of Peter’s blood,” Aldrich responded.

“And we’re going to spill the rest of it,” Garrick said, grinning.

Dr. McNinja blinked twice. What the fuck was wrong with these Pellbrooks?

“Right,” he finally said, “Well, get in the car, boys.”

Dr. McNinja threw open the clinic doors, drawing the key to his Honda Civic. The morning sun was a welcome warmth, but Doc couldn’t help but shiver regardless in the mist. Great. Now he had to babysit as well. Doc changed his mind - he was definitely going to charge Ariel for this job.

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 2, 2021

Dr. McNinja drove silently down the dusty road. The sun was high in the sky. High noon, Doc chuckled to himself. The wind rushing by was a pleasant cocktail of grass scents and soil, and there was a therapeutic quality to the way the gravel crinkled under tires of his Accord.

The two Pellbrook boys sat quietly in the backseats. Garrick hadn’t said anything since he got in Doc’s car, and Aldrich only spoke up to ask Doc how to put on his seatbelt. Garrick had fallen asleep, snoring loudly. Aldrich didn’t seem to be bothered. Honestly, it made sense. A family of farmers like the Pellbrooks probably didn’t have the luxury for individual rooms, especially for six family members.

They had been driving like this, relatively silently (except for Garrick), for about twenty minutes. Doc was already feeling antsy. Probably didn’t help that Garrick’s feet were pressed against the back of Dr. McNinja’s seat.

“Hey,” Dr. Mcninja finally said to Aldrich. His throat was apparently unprepared, because his voice cracked. Doc cleared his throat, embarrassed, before continuing, “You like music?”

Aldrich shrugged almost imperceptibly. Doc sighed and turned to the CD player in the car. He pressed the play button, and the car suddenly burst forth the majestic but unsubtle sounds of “Tubthumping”. Doc apologetically turned down the volume for Garrick, but he didn’t stir at all.

“What was that racket?” Aldrich said, clearly irritated.

“Tubthumping,” Doc replied, “Haven’t heard it?”

“Much too noisy for my taste,” Aldrich mumbled back.

Doc snickered. “Garrick doesn’t seem to mind.”

“This fool?” Aldrich snickered back. “Garrick wouldn’t wake up if you punched him in the face.”

“Well, I don't know about that-”

“No, really,” Aldrich said. Then, as casual as you like, Aldrich threw a vicious left hook across Garrick’s right cheek. Garrick’s head snapped violently to the left, and his cheek instantly turned red… but after a moment, the snoring continued. Aldrich gestured at him and gave Doc a look.

“Huh,” Dr. McNinja mused, “He should probably get that looked at.”

“Yeah,” Aldrich replied, “He’s always the first to wake, though. Probably from all that sleep he’s getting in the day.”

Doc turned the music off and continued to drive. This was a fun, fun, fun road trip. And given how far away those caves were, the three of them were going to have to spend a night camping.

Swell.

***

Dr. McNinja stretched his shoulders. Long drives were the worst, especially if you knew exactly what parts of your body were getting fucked up by staying seated and focused for prolonged periods of time.

He had parked the car in the woods and covered it with a tarp designed for camouflage. It wasn’t quite the right color, but surely it’d be fine. There were plenty of trees nearby to hide their campsite from any bandits passing by on the road.

Aldrich had finally figured out how to open the trunk of the car. Doc kept forgetting that his passengers were still medieval teenagers who weren’t raised with a 21st century car in their garage, but Aldrich seemed to have worked it out regardless. Garrick started pulling out the rods for the tent that Doc packed.

“You know how to set those up?” Doc asked Garrick.

Garrick shrugged. “I don’t understand why you need such fancy materials for a tent, but yes. I’ve gone on hunting trips with- agh.”

The boy winced and held his cheek, apparently only now feeling the soreness from Aldrich’s little demonstration earlier. Aldrich allowed himself a smirk before pulling out his and Garrick’s knapsack.

“Why are we camping out here?” Aldrich asked, helping Garrick with the tent.

Doc pointed at the sun, which was starting to set behind some of the hills to the north.

“Sun’s going down,” the physician explained, “Bad idea to get too close to vampires without a sunny place to retreat to.”

Aldrich nodded, understanding the logic. Garrick grunted as he waved his hands. What Doc saw next was… pretty amazing.

The boy’s eyes glowed blue as the air between Garrick’s fingers sparked and fizzled. After another second, drops of water shot out of the sparks Garrick had conjured. The water started swirling and hovering, gathering into the air as little palm-sized hooks.

Aldrich, at this point, had just finished shoving the tent poles roughly through the tent. He gave a thumbs-up to Garrick, who used the floating water hooks to lift up the tent. Garrick then clapped his hands, conjuring what appeared to be a hammer made of floating water.

Doc would’ve thought that a hammer made of water would be pretty useless, but when Garrick gripped the hammer out of the air, it seemed to maintain its solid form. This was especially odd to watch, because the hammer, for all intents and purposes, still looked like water. Garrick started hammering in the stakes for the tent with the water hammer, with surprising amounts of success. Doc rolled his eyes.

“You know,” Dr. McNinja mumbled, “I brought a hammer with us.”

Garrick didn’t seem to hear him, concentrating on his work. Across from him, Aldrich was conjuring his own hammer. Something about his form seemed more rigid, but fluid at the same time. Doc was proficient enough in martial arts to understand that Aldrich was incredibly practiced, but not as skilled - no, talented - as Garrick.

“So you guys are pretty good at that, huh?” Doc said.

“We drill every day, until Blythe can take over as the next matriarch,” Aldrich replied, “Well, some of us do, anyway.”

Garrick glared at him in response. Doc nodded pensively. “That’s… gonna be a while.”

“The Pellbrook clan’s women are just better at hydromancy than its men,” Garrick said, with no small amount of contempt, “Just how it goes. We men serve the matriarch, whoever she be.”

Doc raised his eyebrows. “This isn’t an inbreeding situation, is it?”

Garrick grimaced in horror. “What? No! Gross! What would make you think that?”

“There was a sacred bloodline like yours from my home universe,” Doc replied, “Lots of inbreeding in that one. Not… too sure how that’s gonna end for everyone, actually.”

Having finished his side of the tent, Garrick stood up and tossed his hammer aside. The hammer made contact with the ground and splashed back into its natural aqueous form. He gestured at Doc’s car.

“This is from your world?”

“Yeah,” Doc said, “It’s a car.”

“We know what cars are,” Garrick snapped.

Doc shrugged. “Haven’t seen one yet, obviously.”

Garrick shut his mouth. He was doing a poor job of hiding his hurt.

Doc sighed. “Sorry. Not trying to rub it in. Just something I noticed.”

“Mama doesn’t like us spending too much time with city folk,” Aldrich said, tossing aside his own hammer. “Not since Father.”

The two brothers fell grim. Doc cleared his throat. No matter what subject Doc discussed, all he would find was yet another messed up element of the Pellbrooks’ lives. He decidedly wanted to finish this job quickly, lest Doc himself fall into depression.

Aldrich looked at the tent with crossed arms. It was a garish thing, red and gray with all sorts of unnecessary patterns.

“Um,” Aldrich said, “This seems… pretty small for the three of us.”

“Oh, I’m not sleeping there,” Doc said, “I’m going to keep watch in… let’s say that tree.”

Dr. McNinja pointed up at a tall unassuming pine nearby. It was covered by another tree’s leaves.

“You don’t need to sleep?”

“I once stayed up for six days straight writing my Nursing Science dissertation. This is nothing.”

Aldrich glanced at him skeptically, but turned around to see Garrick already crawling into the tent. He looked back.

“We can rotate the watch-”

“Seriously, kid,” Doc said, “It’s fine. Sleep. You’ll need the rest.”

Aldrich looked to the side with a complicated expression. Finally, he wordlessly crawled after Garrick into the tent. Doc watched the tent for a second, thinking, before he threw his grappling hook into the air and pulled himself into the sky.

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 15, 2021

Three hours had passed, and Doc was starting to regret his decision. He wasn’t 22 anymore, and his ninja skills had gotten… softer when he arrived at the Crossroads. Or maybe it was him that had gone soft.

Whatever the reason, Doc was starting to drift off. He closed his eyes for a second. He’d just keep them closed for about a minute, and open them again, fresh and ready to go.

Ah, yes. He did need to close his eyes for a moment. Just a bit longer and-

“Hey.”

Doc damn near fell out of the tree. His enhanced instincts allowed him to grip onto the tree before he fully slipped off the branch.

“What the hell?” Doc hissed as he turned to identify the voice.

It was Garrick, who had somehow gotten up to where Doc was. He was grinning impishly at the physician in a tree across from Doc.

“What’re you doing up here?” Doc whispered.

“Just visiting,” Garrick said, “Making sure a vampire didn’t sneak up on you and take you in the night.”

Doc scoffed. “I’m a ninja. Nobody sneaks up on me.’

“I did,” Garrick sneered.

Dr. McNinja rolled his eyes. “Whatever. I’m fine. You don’t need to worry about me.”

Garrick stared out across the trees, almost contentedly.

“This is nice,” the teenager mumbled, almost to himself.

Doc looked at him, lightly surprised. “Yeah. It is.”

Garrick fell quiet for a while. Dr. McNinja shuffled uncomfortably, hoping that Garrick would eventually get bored and leave. But the kid stayed there, just watching the cresting sun. Doc had only known Garrick for about a day, but it was already surreal for him to sit next to the teenager in… pleasant silence.

Doc cleared his throat. “I thought you’d be asleep right now.”

Garrick smirked sadly. “Nah.”

Doc studied Garrick’s face, thinking of what to say next. Garrick, thankfully, continued.

“I uh…” Garrick sighed. “I can’t sleep at night.”

Dr. McNinja was almost instantly next to Garrick, listening to his heart with his stethoscope. Garrick, who hadn’t noticed Doc sneak up on him, understandably jumped back.

“AH!”

“Sorry,” Doc said, “I have a habit of sneaking up on people. Just checking your pulse to see if there’s an actual problem or-“

Garrick smacked Doc’s hand away, looking unamused. Doc replied with his own disapproving glance.

“Sorry, did you not want your insomnia cured, or-“

“Just don’t touch me.”

Doc sighed and nodded. “Alright. Obviously can’t force treatment on you. I’ve killed doctors for less.”

Garrick scowled and looked away. His eyes lost focus as he fell into contemplation. Doc watched the dusk sky again before clearing his throat.

“It’s just that I’m literally the most qualified person to fix a person, and-“

“No, this isn’t something you have to fix,” Garrick sighed, “There’s a… Erm, as in, I do it on purpose.”

Doc squinted. “Night shift?”

“What?”

“Do you have a job at night?”

“A job?” Garrick smirked. “I’m a farmboy. I wasn’t granted the luxury of being born a girl, so all I’m good for is another pair of hands.”

Doc groaned in protest. “Aw, come on, don’t sell yourself short. Even another pair of hands makes everything easier.”

“Yeah,” Garrick grunted.

Garrick grinned, eyes eagerly looking off into the distance. His legs started slightly swinging back and forth. A little disturbed, Doc frowned.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing,” Garrick said, “Just can’t wait to get my hands on that rat bastard.”

Doc stared into the distance again. “You mean Peter?”

“Fucker doesn’t deserve my father’s name,” Garrick spat, “Fucking traitor.”

There was plenty of saliva flying when he said those words, but Garrick mustered some more before spitting it on a nearby branch in disgust. Doc didn’t allow himself to react.

“But he’s your brother.”

Garrick scoffed. “And what a brother he is. He completely betrayed our family. He tried to kill his little sister. MY little sister. He’s a MONSTER, and I’ll be glad to kill him.”

Doc sighed. “Right. You didn’t read my pamphlets. We’re not actually hunting Peter.”

The teen studied Doc’s face with a surprised expression.

“In a way, Peter is already dead,” Dr. McNinja explained. “Sometimes it’s a venom in the fangs, sometimes it’s the blood of a vampire, sometimes it’s just a spell. But whatever it is… it’s designed to kill the victim. And then the… whatever it is, it hijacks the body.”

Doc turned to look at Garrick. “The thing we’re hunting isn’t Peter.”

Garrick looked back, his legs now still. “Even better.”

Doc shook his head. “You don’t understand. The thing we’re hunting is INSIDE Peter.”

After a pause, Doc continued. “There’s a chance we can bring Peter back to some semblance of his old self. There are plenty of vampires that just… live in society, and don’t hurt anyone. Well, with A LOT of help.”

Garrick scoffed. “Big whoop. Too much work.”

“Well, in that sense, it’s too much work to cure Blythe. Are you saying we should kill her, too?”

“No.” Garrick glared at Doc. “Not Blythe. Don’t you dare.”

Doc raised his hands. “I was being rhetorical.”

“What?”

“Erm, making a point.”

“I don’t give a damn,” Garrick snarled, “We cannot let anything happen to Blythe, under any circumstance.”

Garrick’s expression didn’t soften over time. Doc had definitely hit a soft point. But why? Blythe was a little adorable ball of joy, of course, but Garrick didn’t seem the type of guy to be that upset about this argument. Hell, he only seemed to be interested in killing Peter.

“Do you resent her?” Dr. McNinja finally said.

“Excuse me?”

Doc shrugged. “Seems like you have a lot of pent-up anger with the women in your life. Just an observation.”

Garrick looked at him, bewildered. “You get off from judging people?”

“Get paid, actually. I never had the patience to pursue psychology professionally, but I do know its basic principles and common sources of trauma. Five Stages of Grief, you feel me?”

Garrick shook his head. Doc sighed.

“Okay so the Five Stages are Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and… actually, what’s the last one?”

“No, like, I have no idea what that whole sentence meant,” Garrick replied.

Doc blinked. “Talking to people and helping them through their problems… is my job, basically. I know I look… odd, but I’m a professional. I know it’s hard to find someone you can really trust when your whole family is pretty much against you. The cool thing about psychologists- erm, therapists, is that we’re trained to not judge. Just listen and help you process. This is a good opportunity to work through whatever you got.”

Dr. McNinja shrugged. “Also, I’m offering this pro bono. Therapists are expensive, man.”

Garrick snickered. “And why would you be doing that?”

“Because the battlefield is the number one place for unchecked feelings to manifest. They get you killed.”

Garrick’s arrogant expression fell into a pensive one. The crickets in the forest, who were apparently holding their breath until now, started chirping again. Doc mused that they sounded like the heartbeat of the woods. Finally, Garrick inhaled deeply, as if to gather motivation from the breath of the forest. Then, he spoke.

“My father died about fifteen yards from our home.” Garrick’s eyes glazed over, his mind suddenly displaced from his body to look at some scene that Doc couldn’t see. “Bandits were attacking our homestead, as usual. Moron thought he could… I dunno… fight them off or whatever.”

Doc didn’t move his body, afraid he might break the trance. Garrick breathed in through gritted teeth as he continued.

“Went alone. Ma- My mother was pregnant with Blythe at the time, and none of us were old enough to fight.”

Garrick’s eyes watered, but the boy seemed to frown his tears back into his eyes.

“Hell, I wasn’t even awake when it all went down. Didn’t hear any of it. Son of a bitch didn’t even wake us up before he got himself killed. Selfish little idiot.”

“Well, what should he have done instead?”

“Woken us up!” Garrick almost yelled, “We would have helped him. The old man was a retired paladin, and he didn’t even have any Pellbrook blood-“

“Yes, because that’d be incest,” Doc thought to himself.

“-but we were already manifesting water magic already. But no, the goddamn bastard had to go OFF ALONE. WE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO SAY GOODBYE!”

Garrick was now gripping the branch he was sitting on so tightly that the tree was starting to creak. The boy seemed to notice, and released his grip. He snickered bitterly. “Well, there’s always one thing that the Pellbrook men are good for.”

Dr. McNinja blinked. He turned to Garrick and studied his expression.

“What’s that?”

Garrick shook his head. “It’s nothing. Just something my father used to say.”

“Ah. So what is the one thing Pellbrook men are good for?”

“He never said,” Garrick shrugged, “If I were to guess, though, we’re good for dying.”

Doc raised his eyebrows, and snorted.

“Jesus, that’s dark,” the physician remarked through stifled laughter.

Garrick looked back, almost offended. Then, after a second, the boy started chuckling as well. The two of them started laughing hard.

“Don’t wanna change subjects, but how did you get up here so fast?” Doc snickered.

“It wasn’t fast. It took me like ten minutes. The tree was shaking and everything.”

Doc rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

The two of them lingered in their laughter for a moment, resting on their lifted spirits. Dr. McNinja looked at Garrick after a respectful amount of time with an earnest look.

“Listen, Garrick, I know you’re at that exact age when you don’t want to hear this,” Doc said, “But you’re still a kid. I know it’s hard to really grasp that. It’s hard enough without all the baggage you have. Being a teen is confusing. ”

Doc sensed that Garrick was about to say something, so interrupted him right back. “I’m not trying to invalidate you. What I’m saying is… Your pain? What you’re going through? It sucks. And I’m sorry you had to go through it. But it’s not your fault. Your father did that because he loved you and wanted the best for you.”

Garrick glared at Doc again, but with added hostility. “Fuck you.”

With that, Garrick jumped off the branch. Doc watched him fall with no small amount of concern, but sighed in relief as the boy created what seemed to be a spear made of water. Garrick used the spear to stab into a nearby tree, slowing his momentum, before landing hard on the ground. He walked back towards the camp, not looking back at Dr. McNinja.

Damn. Doc was making some good headway, too.

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 15, 2021

INTERLUDE

Covered in the sweat of plague and the pallor of undeath, Blythe Pellbrook shuddered.

The blond child was lying restlessly in her bed, watching the ceiling of the bedroom in a dizzy stupor. The other beds were ominously empty, leaving Blythe with a creeping loneliness. The ceiling was once made of fine red oak, but after years of mournful despair, had grown green with mold and decay. Blythe found this interesting, as the floors of her humble home were grey with dust that had been pounded into the floorboards. A small bulb hanging from a thick wire on the ceiling lit the room with a dim glow that strained to shine through the grime and fog that spread over Blythe’s window. The only furniture to speak of (other than the numerous bunks for Blythe’s brothers) was a dinghy cupboard where Blythe put her things, on top of which rested her father’s old music box. It creaked out a bitter tune endlessly.

Mama and Oswin didn’t know, but Blythe could hear their conversation downstairs. Fortunately for them, Blythe was too delirious to really pay attention.

Oswin sat at the table in the main room. Though Ariel was silent, the matriarch’s fury was unspeakably suffocating. She was pacing back and forth, from one wall to the other, her clogs rhythmically clonking on the rotting floors. She finally stopped and rested her arm against the one mangled pillar holding the whole house together, causing it to creak out yet another death throe.

“I know I already said it,” Ariel snarled, “But that ungrateful twerp has officially taken this too far.”

Oswin stayed silent. He knew what to do when Mama was storming around like this, but the child had never seen Mama this angry before. Not even when his twin brother Garrick accidentally let all the horses loose. Ariel gripped the sides of her face, her face contorted into a silent, furious scream.

She turned to Oswin, her face suddenly very calm.

“Are we sure it was Peter’s gang who took them?”

Oswin shook his head. “But the hole was dug recently, and the tracks are gone. I imagine it must’ve been while we were getting attacked the other night.”

Ariel snarled again. She turned to Oswin, her face again controlled.

“Call your brothers and the doctor,” Ariel mumbled, “Tell them your father’s bones are missing.”

393 words.

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 16, 2021

ACT II

Dr. McNinja and Garrick stared at the Honda Civic, which the pair had roughly disguised as a rock covered in leaves.

“Whatever,” Doc said to Garrick with a tone far from reassuring, “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

Garrick gave him an unconvinced look. The two hadn’t spoken about their conversation the night before, and frankly, Doc wasn’t too keen to return to it. He was only just realizing how unqualified he was for the position. Not literally, of course, he WAS a psychiatrist. But therapists need to be patient. Doc simply wasn’t.

Meanwhile, in the distance, Aldrich had formed a small puddle in the forest floor near where the campsite was. His eyes were glowing blue, and the boy heard him say “Okay” and “Yeah” over and over.

Garrick smirked. “Talking to Mama.”

Doc moved his head back to denote comprehension, and threw another branch on top of his car. God, he was going to have to wash this later.

It was far too risky to take the car so close to the bandits. As far as the Pellbrook boys could tell, the bandits didn’t have a car. So not only would driving a car fully into the caves on an unpacked gravelly road be disastrous for the car, it would alert their approach to the bandits, AND could even get stolen if they weren’t careful. This was barely a solution, but it was better than anything else. Not like Judy was around to drive it back to Doc’s office.

Aldrich nodded one last time, then waved his hands. The puddle drained into the soil, almost hurriedly. The young man approached the pair with a grim expression.

“Father’s bones were stolen in the night,” Aldrich said, “Oswin thinks it was Peter.”

Doc rolled his eyes in exasperation as Garrick yelled, “WHAT?”

“Great. Now we know for sure Peter is trying to turn Blythe,” Doc mumbled, “AND the kid knows medicina venefica. Yep, he’s definitely gone bad…”

Dr. McNinja looked at Garrick and Aldrich.

“I think we’re going to have to kill him for real.”

Aldrich looked at him, surprised. “Were we not here to kill him?”

“I figured maybe I could fix him,” Doc said, “Your family’s going through a lot already. It’d be nice to prevent another tragedy. Seems like we’re too late to stop this one, though…”

Garrick’s face fell. Aldrich noticed his reaction and scowled.

“Well,” Dr. McNinja sighed, noticing the sun, “We’ll have to make do. The most important thing is his blood. I’ve heard of other physicians using stem cell growth to replicate the needed effect from ancestral bones, a complicated and experimental procedure which I could certainly jury-rig in half a day, I’m sure. Anyway, we’re burning daylight. Let’s get going.”

Without another word, Doc slung his hiking back over his shoulders and started trotting down the trail to the caves. The two Pellbrook brothers gave each other a complicated expression before they donned their own packs and jogged to catch up with Doc.

The trail was rough, but about as good as you could get from these woods. At least the gnarled roots weren’t getting in the way. That’d be the safer option, honestly, but the boys said they’d be more comfortable staying near the small stream. Made sense. So they decided to follow it to where the caves were.

“Also,” Aldrich added, a little out of breath, “Oswin is coming to help us.”

“Is he now?” Doc said, “What’s he like? Couldn’t really get a read on him.”

Garrick snorted. “He’s my younger twin. An ice-cold fucker-“

“Language,” Aldrich snapped.

“-and a ruthless killer. You’ll want him on a manhunt.”

Dr. McNinja gave him a quizzical look. “So why didn’t he come along? Not that I don’t appreciate your help, but I’d feel more comfortable with more hands on deck.”

“We volunteered to come here,” Aldrich replied.

“Well,” Garrick shrugged, “We insisted.”

Doc smirked. “Aw, you guys like me that much?”

The two boys started protesting immediately. Doc didn’t listen, saving his breath and energy to think about the next steps.

The stem cell thing was a long shot. Honestly, Doc was more hoping that Peter had, for some sentimental reason, kept his father’s bones with him. But this latest bit of information brought up some startling implications. This was a planned strike. Peter turned Blythe so that they’d leave to seek help, just to desecrate his father’s bones while the Pellbrooks were gone. Well, to cover his bases, most likely.

Did Peter run away from his home two weeks prior to the attack? Or was he taken by a vampire? Ariel said that there were no signs of foul play and assumed it was an act of pubescent rebellion. That was likely. Vampires can’t just sneak into a home, they need to be invited in. It sure seemed that Peter left of his own accord.

But there was one detail that still bothered Doc. Two weeks was a long time for Peter to still consider the Pellbrook homestead his own home. He would’ve adjusted to his bandit lifestyle at that point. So how did he get invited in? Who was awake? Blythe was the one to alert the household, but… Wait a minute.

“Hey, Garrick?” Doc said, breaking his silence.

“Hm?”

“You must’ve been awake when Peter attacked, right?”

“Mhm.”

Doc turned to him, incredulous.

“Uh… anything you wanna tell me about it?”

Garrick shrugged. “I wasn’t there.”

“Pardon?” Doc snapped.

Aldrich sighed. “Garrick patrols the fields outside the house at night. He thinks he’s being sneaky, but we know.”

“Hey!”

“And the bandits all got past you, huh?” Doc said.

“I’m one man. I can only cover so much ground,” Garrick snapped, clearly feeling defensive.

“No, no, I’m not accusing you of anything,” Doc said, looking forward. This meant that these bandits knew to go around Garrick’s nighttime walk. That made sense, Peter was with them. “And did you see any of them running away?”

“A couple of their faces, yeah,” Garrick said, “They were wearing hoods, but I’d recognize those rat bastards anywhere.”

“Was Peter leading them?”

Garrick shrugged. “I dunno. They were all just running.”

Doc looked at him. Garrick stared back. “What?”

“Did you…” Doc paused for a moment. “Did you actually see Peter?”

Garrick gave Doc an irritated glare. “What, you don’t think it was him?”

“No, it was definitely him,” Doc reassured Garrick, “I’m just trying to get as much information as I can. Did you see him?”

“Yes, I did,” Garrick snapped, “He was completely covered up, with the hood and some facemask, but I’d recognize his magic anywhere. His hands were wrapped with water.”

Aldrich nodded. “Only Peter does that. Says it helps him focus on what effect he wants. Makes sense, for his type of magic.”

Doc tilted his head. Aldrich cleared his throat.

“There are several forms of water magic that the Pellbrook bloodline is associated with,” Aldrich explained, “The women are famously capable of mastering all of them. The men… well, we have to specialize. By the time we come of age, we start losing our affinity for the other forms.

“For example, I’ve attuned to the form of ‘Wandering Waves’. I can use water to generate momentum and movement. Garrick here makes constructs.”

“It’s called ‘Tideborne Steel’,” Garrick proclaimed with triumph.

Doc squinted at Aldrich. “Wait, but I saw you make a hammer last night.”

“We can all dabble,” Garrick explained, “But when it comes to more intense magic, Aldrich’s constructs just don’t compare to mine.”

“But I win anyway,” Aldrich sighed, “Your spears mean jackshit since you don’t know how to use them.”

Garrick glared at Aldrich, seemingly ready to demonstrate his spears right then and there. Doc placed his hands at the boys’ shoulders, prompting them to both look at him with perplexed expressions.

“No fighting, boys, or I will turn this hike around,” Dr. McNinja quipped, “So what’s Peter’s… specialty?”

Garrick shrugged Doc’s right hand off, while Aldrich pushed his left as politely as he could.

“He’s a healer,” Aldrich answered, “But there’s always a binary sense to our magic. A… balance, you could say. I can push with my magic as much as I want, but eventually, I also need to pull, or my pushing magic grows weaker.”

Garrick nodded. “And for every pointy thing I make, I also need to release the water eventually and let it dissipate.”

“Push and pull, condensing and releasing…” Aldrich continued.

“Just like the tide,” the two said simultaneously. Clearly, they’d heard it a lot.

“Interesting,” Doc said, “So that means Peter can… unheal?”

Aldrich nodded. “In a way. That’s the necrotic wound that Blythe had. Since Mama’s a healer too, we thought it would go away when she cast her spell. But… well… we know what happened.”

Dr. McNinja thought about this information. He contemplated the implications of vampirism transferring through this kind of magic. If Peter’s vampirically-enhanced necrotic magic could turn someone into a vampire, perhaps it could also do the opposite.

Bah. Peter would have to want it, which he clearly didn’t. Doc abandoned that line of thought. Ugh. Magic.

“And Oswin?” Doc asked.

The two boys grew grimmer before Garrick answered.

“He’s attuned to ‘Suntouched Depths’. It’s temperature control. Freezing and boiling.”

Doc nodded. “Alright, that sounds convenient. Why are you horrified by this?”

Aldrich turned to look at Doc. “He can freeze the liquid in your eyes and crush them. He can boil the blood around your skull and make it explode. He can burn your heart from the inside and turn the piss in your dick into tiny icicles.”

Doc gulped.

“I assume… you know this because…”

The two boys nodded. Doc widened his eyes in disbelief.

“If he’s your twin, that means he’s 15?” Doc mumbled to Garrick, “That’s… not how 15-year-olds behave.”

But then, neither was the way Garrick acted. This whole family was a mess.

“Like I said,” Garrick said, “He’s an ice-cold fu- guy.”

***

The rest of the hike was uneventful. Dr. McNinja stared up at their destination while the boys marked their new campsite.

The forest gave way to a small cliff, which Doc would have been tempted to call a hill if it wasn’t quite so craggy and flat. Along the face of the cliff were several holes and small trails of water that formed into the slightly larger stream they were following. According to the map, this was a plateau with a river running past it. The river started chipping at the plateau and forming small winding tunnels down to the woods surrounding the cliff. Little holes pocked the side of the rock. Maybe they were designed to be handholds for people to climb.

There were… so many caves here.

“That’s a lot of caves,” Aldrich said as he tightly wound the string on his pack.

“I was just thinking that,” Doc said with a scowl, “And we’re gonna have to check all of them, too.”

“We could just loudly challenge them,” Garrick said, cracking his knuckles, “We can take em.”

Aldrich scoffed. “Then they wait for nightfall and Peter uses his magic to turn us all into vampires. Good idea, Garrick.”

“He’s right,” Doc said, quietly counting the caves that seemed big enough to house a whole bandit gang, and low enough to be reachable by the average ne’er-do-well. “Especially since Peter will have help. We should assume they know we’re coming, but they don’t know we’re here yet. They’ll not want to come out of their safe little hidey hole until they know where we are.”

Aldrich nodded. “We should split up. Cover more ground.”

“We should absolutely not,” Doc snapped at Aldrich, “Are you crazy? NEVER split up. Have you never seen a horror movie?”

The two boys stared at him blankly. Doc twitched.

“Okay, that was dumb of me. Still. A vampire is most vulnerable when feeding, so they prey on one person at a time. No matter how good a vampire hunter is, they are exponentially safer with a person covering their back.”

“So why did you want to come alone?” Garrick said.

“Because I’m not just a vampire hunter,” Doc said, “I’m also a doctor.”

The boys stared at him expectantly. They waited for Doc to elaborate, but evidently that was the end of his sentence.

“Fine,” Aldrich said, “We’ll move together. Doc, you’re our specialist, so you stay in the back. Garrick and I will cover you.”

Dr. McNinja gave him an amused glance.

“Alright, sure. Here, take these.”

Doc tossed both of the boys some pouches. Garrick nearly dropped his.

“What’s this?” Aldrich asked while Garrick opened the pouch.

“A basic tool for vampire hunting,” Doc said, “I found that crosses and holy water don’t work too well in the Crossroads, since Jesus wasn’t AS big a deal in this world. So I’m giving you some rice. If you scatter it, a vampire is compelled to stop whatever they’re doing and count each grain. Also, sprinkle yourself with this garlic oil.”

Doc tossed a small vial with a spray to Aldrich. The teen started spraying himself, his eyes squeezed shut.

“Wait, so garlic really protects against a vampire?” Garrick said incredulously.

“Nah,” Doc said, “They just really don’t like the taste. So if one bites you, the traditional way, they’ll probably recoil a bit. They’ll still get you, though, so be careful.”

Aldrich’s face crumpled. “God, this smells awful.”

Doc then tossed some sharpened wooden stakes to Garrick. He stared at them.

“I know you like your spears, Garrick, but the only way to kill a vampire is to cut off their head or stake their heart with something wooden. Now, important distinction.”

Dr. McNinja leaned in closely. “When you stake a vampire, you need to pin their heart against something. Could be anything, doesn’t matter, as long as the stake goes all the way through and touches something else.”

“Do I need to be touching the stake?” Aldrich asked.

“What?” Doc hesitated. “No? I mean, it’s pretty hard to shove a stake through someone’s chest without touching it.”

Garrick nodded. “Can I use my magic to stake the vampire instead?”

Doc gave him a deadpan stare. “What did I just say about wood.”

Aldrich smacked Garrick over the head again, prompting the younger brother to glare at him, almost visibly fuming. God, this was gonna be a whole-ass disaster.

“Let’s check that one out first. And hey, who knows?” Doc said, prepping his own weapons, “If we’re lucky, we’ll find it before Oswin even gets here.”

***

“IT’S ANT-BEARS”

The trio were stumbling over their feet and some short, stubby stalagmites. They panted hard as they sprinted through the tunnel towards the distant light.

“WHAT THE FUCK IS AN ANT-BEAR” Doc screamed in reply to Aldrich.

“I FEEL LIKE YOU CAN PUT IT TOGETHER FROM CONTEXT!” Garrick shouted.

Doc turned around to look at them again. Behind him (but not behind enough), a veritable swarm of horribly monstrosities gave chase. As far as Doc could tell, it was some horrible mix of an ant and a bear. Probably why they were called ant-bears.

Though it was about the size of a full-grown grizzly, the basic structure of the beast seemed to be ant-shaped. It had three segmented bodies and six insect-like legs, even a giant stinger. However, instead of the hard carapace that ants have, the ant-bear was rippling with what looked like pure muscle coated in bristling fur.

Their heads were easily the most horrifying element. Though the basic shape looked to be a regular bear head, the ant-bear had a pair of horrifyingly large antennae instead of the cute round ears that bears typically have. Their eyes were where a bear’s eyes would be, but they had what Doc could only describe as hundreds of mammalian eyeballs clumped into the approximation of compound eyes. Furthermore, on the sides of their mouths, they had gigantic, slobbering pincers that clicked together so loud they made a slamming noise. And, of course, the entire swarm was screaming with a strange chitter-roar that Doc would surely have nightmares about for years to come.

“WHY ARE THERE ANT-BEARS?” Garrick screamed as he leapt over a particularly large boulder, which got crushed after a few seconds under the pointed leg of one particularly fast ant-bear. Garrick turned around and haphazardly threw a spear at the creature. It embedded itself into its skull, but continued to skitter forward angrily.

“WHAT DO THEY EAT? DO THEY EAT PEOPLE?” Doc shouted, looking up. Three or four ant-bears were apparently defying gravity and the laws of wall-climbing and clambering along the ceiling of the tunnel. And they were gaining. Doc frantically chopped at them, forcing them to fall and get crushed by the horde of their fellow monsters.

“WHO CARES, JUST RUN!” Aldrich shouted back.

They were getting close. The beasts apparently were content to stay in the dank and dark cave to make their hives, but Doc had no idea if leaving the cave was going to keep them safe. After all, neither ants nor bears were particularly afraid to enter the sunlight. And given how territorial they were, and how deep the trio got into the hive, these ant-bears were PISSED.

Doc was the first to leave the cave, followed almost immediately by Aldrich and Garrick. As he landed on the ground, Aldrich slapped a rock behind him. Water splashed out from his shoulders, appearing from nowhere, and slammed hard into the top of the cave entrance. A second later, just as the first few ant-bears started catching up, the entrance collapsed, scattering some rocks on a few unlucky creatures.

Though the cave collapsed, two ant-bears managed to clamber through the rubble before the entrance was completely blocked. Doc promptly lunged forward and punched one in the snout, sending the entire ant-bear flying back. The other jumped high into the air, clearly intending to land on Aldrich. The boy responded by stepping to the side and waving his arms, leaving a trail of floating raindrops in his wake. His shoulders erupted with more water, catching the ant-bear out of the sky and hurling the creature far off the side of the cliff and into the woods.

Garrick, meanwhile, gathered his energy and hurled a baker’s dozen of aquatic spears at the ant-bear Doc had punched. Each landed with a hard thud into the creature’s flesh and pinned the creature to the cliff. Immediately afterwards, the spears lost their form and splashed onto the ground like water normally does. The ant-bear followed suit, collapsing hard onto the wet crag. It stood up as if to continue chase, then collapsed, fully dead.

The three of them fell onto the ground, extremely out of breath. In front of them, the rubble started shaking. Doc could still hear the ant-bears struggling against it, their skittering and snarling muffled but still frightening. The physician took out his notepad and flipped the pages to the hand-drawn diagram of the cave entrances he’d marked, and crossed out the one they just entered.

“Ant… bears…” Doc said as he wrote on his notes.

“Ant-bears aren’t s’pposed…” Garrick panted, “to be this… aggressive… What the hell!”

“Still reeling on the fact that there are things called ANT-BEARS,” Doc groaned.

“They operate on smell and pheromones,” Aldrich mumbled, “Basically the smellier something is, the more aggressive they act towards it.”

The two Pellbrook boys sniffed themselves and the garlic oil they covered themselves with. They glared at Dr. McNinja, who shrugged.

“How the fuck was I supposed to expect this would happen? I didn’t even know there ANT-BEARS. What kind of fucked up biology is that?”

The cave-in rumbled again. The skittering was getting louder.

“We should leave,” Doc noted, still catching his breath. The three of them jogged down the steps of the cliff back towards their campsite.

***

All in all, the three of them had investigated seven caves before sunset. None of them were nearly as dramatic as the very first one they entered; Doc realized those little pocks were not handholds, but ant-bear tracks, and the group unanimously decided to avoid those caves. The other ones were pretty empty and short, surprisingly.

Garrick wiped his brow as Aldrich climbed down from the latest cave they checked out. It was a long and deep tunnel, but ultimately devoid of any signs of residence.

“Maybe they’re not here,” Garrick mumbled, “I mean, who wants to live so near an ant-bear colony anyway?”

“Probably some outlaws who want to live where law enforcement won’t explore,” Aldrich said.

“I don’t know if that logic holds, but this place still makes a lot of sense in my book,” Dr. McNinja replied, “These caves aren’t artificial thresholds, so a vampire could go wherever they want. Meaning this whole cliff is one giant maze protected from sunlight. Perfect hideout for a vampire.”

“Maybe we’re thinking about this all wrong,” Aldrich muttered.

Doc looked at him. “How do you mean?”

“We’ve been tracking the group like they’re all vampires,” Aldrich said, “But we haven’t considered that maybe the rest of them are humans.”

Dr. McNinja pondered the thought, then nodded. “I suppose it’s possible that Peter wasn’t the one to decide their living quarters. We still don’t know how high up the ranks he is in the gang.”

“So what’s the plan now?” Garrick asked.

“We’ll continue the search tomorrow,” Doc grumbled, “I still think they’re camped out somewhere around here.”

Aldrich frowned in confusion. “What makes you think that?”

“Just a feeling.”

Aldrich raised an eyebrow in irritation. Garrick sighed.

“Well, there isn’t enough food in the pack. If there are ant-bears, that must mean that there are plenty carrots or beets around here, which means rabbits.”

Doc tilted his head. “Can you hunt?”

“What, you think I can’t?” Garrick scowled.

Doc looked at Aldrich to check with him. Aldrich shook his head, making Garrick groan.

“I don’t need your permission, Aldrich. I’m leaving.”

“Maybe not a good idea,” Doc called after him, “We’re dangerously close to a vampire’s hideout for you to be wandering at night.”

“I’ll be back before sundown!” Garrick hollered back as he stormed off deeper into the woods.

Doc and Aldrich sat on the forest floor. Both of them were too tired to get up and stop Garrick, so they just watched him leave. Dr. McNinja sighed and stood up.

“Welp,” he said finally, “Guess we might as well start a fire.”

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 16, 2021

Dr. McNinja threw another bit of wood onto the small campfire. Stones were arranged around it to prevent a forest fire. Hm. Maybe Doc set the forest outside of his office on fire. Those woods were haunted.

But no guarantee about this forest. Well, it was infested by vampires, bandits and horrible ant-bears, but there was no clue that it was also infested by ghosts. Maybe Doc should burn this one too, just in case.

Point is, Dr. McNinja was following as many fire safety rules as one could when making a campfire in the middle of a very flammable forest. At the moment, he and Aldrich were sitting around it, escaping the surprisingly chill of the night.

Aldrich had, using his momentum magic, somehow caught a rabbit that was passing by. It was munching on some mushrooms that were surrounding a tree, and Aldrich just kinda snatched it out of the air with some water. So Doc had to wonder what was taking Garrick so long, if Aldrich had just… caught one. Garrick had been gone for about two hours. How much fucking food was that kid gonna get?

“So,” Dr. McNinja finally said.

“What?” Aldrich said. He turned the skewer which was holding the rabbit over the fire. The pair had stayed completely silent while Aldrich skinned his catch. Hell, the dead rabbit was making more noise in its last few minutes than these two had since they set up camp.

“I heard about…” Doc paused. “Your father.”

Aldrich nodded, his eyes set on the rabbit. “What about him?”

“Well, how he passed,” Doc continued, “Garrick got pretty upset about it.”

Aldrich shrugged. “He does that.”

Doc raised an eyebrow at the reaction. “You seem… not as upset?”

Aldrich shrugged again. “What’s to be upset about?”

“The…” Doc frowned. “The death of your father?”

“It is what it is.”

Dr. McNinja leaned forward. Aldrich rolled his eyes and picked up the skewer, stabbing it upright into the ground.

“Alright, I see what you’re going for here,” Aldrich interrupted, “I get it. I’m not fine. None of us are. We’ve gone through shit.”

Doc nodded, listening. Aldrich formed two knives of water and started carving the rabbit.

“But let’s just save some time. I’m not interested in going through a heartfelt conversation or whatever. You’re not gonna fix me, but you don’t have to worry about me. My baggage won’t get in the way.”

Dr. McNinja twiddled his thumbs and lowered his eyes respectfully.

“I just have a question,” Dr. McNinja said.

Aldrich didn’t meet Doc’s eyes, instead choosing to focus on the rabbit. But the kid eventually nodded.

“You seem… really okay with killing Peter.”

Aldrich shrugged. “Not hearing a question.”

Doc nodded. “Okay. Why are you so okay with killing your brother?”

Aldrich pulled hard on the rabbit’s leg, snapping it right off. Meat juice squirted onto his face. Despite how hot the grease must have been, Aldrich nonchalantly wiped it off.

“It is what it is.”

“You say that a lot.”

“Because you’re asking questions about my feelings,” Aldrich said, “I know this situation sucks. There’s just nothing to be done about it. So what’s the point of feeling all upset about it?”

Aldrich pulled on the other leg as well. The stick was holding remarkably well for a random tree branch that Doc found. But then, Doc noticed the warbling around the stick and the steam that was rising from the rabbit. Of course. Aldrich was holding it in place with magic. Ugh.

Aldrich sniffled. “My brother, for whatever reason, decided to leave his responsibilities in our family, and got bit by a vampire. Now he’s traveling with some bandits. Probably in charge of them, too. I know you think so.”

Doc nodded pensively. “It’s a theory.”

“Then the answer is simple.” Aldrich summoned some water and started washing a nearby flat rock. “We need to stop him. From hurting other people, and from dishonoring our family.”

Doc nodded again. “So your family is very important to you?”

Aldrich waved his hands, and the water seemed to evaporate completely, leaving a dry and remarkably clean slate. He started placing the meat on the rock.

“I live with them. That’s my reality. Whatever it takes for me to survive in my reality, I do. Simple.”

Doc didn’t nod this time. Aldrich seemed to notice.

“You don’t approve.”

“Doesn’t seem like a particularly happy life.”

“Happiness isn’t an option,” Aldrich mumbled, “Not for me. But I’ve made my peace with it. Like I said, my emotions won’t be a problem.”

“I disagree.”

Aldrich shrugged. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Mm.” Aldrich smirked sadly. The teen placed the slate of rabbit meat at Doc’s feet.

Dr. McNinja stared at the meat for a bit. Meanwhile, Aldrich started carving his own portion.

Doc cleared his throat, keeping his eyes on the meal. “And what do you want?”

“Nothing.”

Dr. McNinja looked up. “You must want something.”

“Honestly, I want to stop talking.”

“And after that?”

“After that,” Aldrich grunted, “I’ll find Peter, trap him like you taught us, then kill him. Then I want us to go home and cure Blythe.”

“Sure,” Doc said, “And after that?”

Aldrich seemed to get fully irritated with the questions. “Well, then we’ll harvest this year’s crops, fight off some more bandits, then one day, I’ll die. Is that what you want to hear?”

Dr. McNinja brushed off some ants who were starting to get attracted to his plate, reminded of the horrible creatures he saw earlier that day. He lifted it up and placed it on his lap to protect them.

“No,” Doc responded, “Honestly, it’s not what I want to hear.”

Aldrich raised an eyebrow.

“You’re a good kid,” Doc continued, “You deserve to follow your dreams. Or, at least, have dreams.”

Aldrich snickered bitterly. “You don’t know anything about me.”

“I have a pretty good sense of people, actually,” Doc replied gently, “And I can tell that your family is good people. You have issues, like you said, but that’s to be expected from a family that’s constantly put on edge by roving bandit gangs and monsters.”

Aldrich frowned to communicate his displeasure, but waited for Doc to continue.

“Which is why I’m having such a hard time believing that Peter just… decided to become a child of the night,” Doc finished.

Aldrich raised his eyebrows, surprised. “But… he is. We have proof.”

“I know,” Doc admitted, “I’m not debating whether Peter is a vampire. I’m just wondering why.”

This sentence seemed to stun Aldrich even more. The teen waited for almost a full minute before continuing to carve his rabbit. Dr. McNinja leaned in.

“I could use some insight into what kind of boy Peter is, Aldrich,” Doc said, “What can you tell me?”

Aldrich shrugged. “Peter was a quiet kid. Like the rest of us, Father’s death hit him hard. Since then, he’s been obsessed with modern technology. You know, like your car and the computers and… whatever that is you’re wearing.”

Doc grinned wryly. “Labcoat. You were saying?”

Aldrich popped a piece of meat into his mouth with his fingers. He chewed for a bit before speaking.

“He had this notion, Peter did,” Aldrich said, “That the Pellbrooks had spent too much time away from civilization. Isolated ourselves. That our lifestyle was what put us in danger so often and… cost us Father.”

Aldrich chewed again. “He was always looking for a way that he could help secure our homestead without risking us. I remember how much he begged Mother for one of those… Joneses?”

Doc frowned in confusion. Aldrich rolled his eyes.

“I forget what they’re called. It’s a small metal contraption that flies like a bird, and you can control it with a small box.”

“Drone,” Doc corrected.

“Right,” Aldrich said, “Mama said there was no point to it, because of our Scrying Pools. Peter said something about how Father was alone out there precisely because none of us were awake to use the Scrying Pool. That seemed to set Mama off real bad.”

Doc nodded. “When was this?”

“About a week before Peter ran away,” Aldrich sighed, “I figured he was out to get one of those drone things. Mama was ready to whoop his ass raw when he came back home.”

Dr. McNinja took in the information warily. “So you’re saying that Peter was actively looking for ways to improve your living conditions through radical methods.”

Aldrich squinted his eyes a bit.

“Do you think,” Doc continued, “That maybe he might have tried to make a deal with a vampire?”

Aldrich paused again, then continued to carve.

“Well, we know he left of his own choice,” Aldrich said, “We all share a room, and there were no signs of trouble. Hell, he packed some of his things with him. So I suppose what you’re suggesting is that, after he left, he got tricked by a vampire and got bit.”

Doc nodded. “Vampires do love tricking their solitary victims.”

“Now, answer me this, Doctor,” Aldrich mused, “Does that make killing Peter any more wrong?”

It was McNinja’s turn to be stunned. Aldrich leaned forward and continued.

“It doesn’t matter why he became a vampire. He’s still a monster, and he’s still using a tainted version of our magic to hurt people. It’s putting shame on the Pellbrook name.”

“I thought you didn’t care about your family’s honor.”

“I don’t,” Aldrich clarified, “But my mother does.”

“And you care about what your mother wants.”

Aldrich blinked, but otherwise continued to eat. Dr. McNinja tilted his head.

“Is that all you care about?”

“Does it matter?”

“It should.” Doc peered into Aldrich’s eyes. “You should be doing what feels right to you.”

Aldrich averted his gaze. Doc persisted his stare.

“So here’s the decision you need to make. Vampires don’t do what they do because they’re manically evil,” the physician explained, “Well, the old ones are pretty awful, but that’s because they spent upwards of a hundred years constantly battling their disease by doing morally reprehensible things, watching everything decay around them. Immortality can really fuck you up, especially if it’s constant pain.

“Because that’s vampirism is. It’s constant hunger, an addiction, to the point of pain. And only one thing really satisfies that hunger. Every ethical person then has to answer one question. Is my suffering really worth my morals? If I have to live with this burning in my throat and my stomach, in what’s left of my soul, for five hundred years just so I can feel good about myself… Is that worth it?

“Maybe… Maybe I’ll take one sip. Just one little person. Maybe one who doesn’t really matter. Maybe they were bad anyway. Maybe I can use my condition for good. And that’s how it starts.”

Aldrich was watching Doc with fascination. Chances are, nobody had told him much about vampires except the stories that go around, with the capes and castles and cackling.

Doc inhaled deeply. “You ever kill someone, Aldrich?”

Aldrich shook his head.

“But you’ve seen people die.”

Aldrich nodded.

“So you get it. You know what it’s like to watch a person die. But you will never, NEVER understand how scarring it is to kill. You have to turn off a part of your brain. People are engineered to feel horrified about death, and to knowingly cause it is… worse.”

Doc leaned in, his black mask becoming a shade of warm grey-yellow in the firelight. Aldrich subconsciously leaned in himself.

“So say you drain someone who you think should die, someone probably pretty awful. Let’s say a bandit who’s been happily pillaging your family home for years. You kill them. You feel that same horror of having killed someone, and you want to beg for forgiveness from someone. Anyone. Because you have never felt better in your entire life. It’s like someone stabbed you in red-hot metal spikes for weeks, and finally, they’ve been taken out.”

Doc paused dramatically. “But then… approximately 18 hours later… the spikes come back.”

The fire crackled as both men fell silent for a moment. Doc looked intensely into Aldrich’s eyes.

“So you find another bandit, maybe. Maybe you get scared that you’ll get caught. At this point, you’re maybe not afraid to die. You’re just afraid that the people you love will see you like this, especially your overbearing older brother, or your mother, who’s gone through so much pain already. You can’t bear to hurt them like that, because somewhere in the back of your mind, somewhere you dare not look, somewhere you might not even know about… you still love them.

“You love them so much that it hurts to think about them. Or to think at all. And you’re just so tired. You know what it’s like to be tired? Existentially tired?”

Aldrich didn’t respond, but Doc knew the answer without words.

“God, it’d feel good to just lie down, right? When you’re that tired?” Doc whispered, “It’d feel so good to just let go. Maybe just do whatever you want. Just let that burning hunger take over for a second, if only it would shut up, just for a moment. You’re sick of scurrying in the dark. You haven’t seen the sun in days and everything burns. So you do. You let go. It’s not like anyone cares, right? Nobody can help you. ”

Doc paused again. He looked at Aldrich again.

“So, tell me, Aldrich. What do you think we should do to that person?”

Aldrich shuddered. He sat back, his face returning to his stoic expression from before, but he couldn’t hide how disturbed he was. Doc figured this was the first time Aldrich really thought about what he was doing. Poor kid was just going through the motions, and doing what he was told. But now?

“I…” Aldrich gulped hard. “I don’t know.”

Doc watched him with a tender expression, and he nodded. “Yeah. Me neither. I wish there was an answer that sat better with my conscience, but usually I have to kill them. It doesn’t feel great. I’d give a lot to find that easier answer.”

Dr. McNinja pulled at the nose portion of his face mask and dropped the meat into his mouth stealthily; to the naked eye, however, it would appear that the meat just… slipped into Doc’s mouth through the mask. Aldrich looked at him curiously.

“You don’t even take it off to eat?” Aldrich asked.

“Being a ninja is treacherous business,” Doc answered, chewing the meat. It was… really good, actually, for a meat that was roasted in the most makeshift way possibly. “We make a lot of enemies. So my family has a tradition of wearing masks to hide our identity from the moment we’re born. It’s a last resort, because literally nobody has seen my face before. Once I take this off… I am no longer a McNinja.”

Doc slipped another piece of meat into his mask. “So, like my dad says… We learned some ninja tricks.”

Aldrich squinted. “That’s… huh.”

“Yeah.”

“Pretty intense.”

Doc grinned. “It is what it is.”

Aldrich snickered and chewed his own piece of rabbit. This was possible the first time Doc had seen Aldrich smile genuinely. Aldrich had smirked plenty of times, but now the kid was actually relaxed.

Aldrich broke into a full chuckle. “Heh, so that’s what that feels like-“

Doc snatched Aldrich’s arm, raising a finger to his mouth- or, rather, where his mouth would be under the mask. Aldrich stared at him, bewildered.

Dr. McNinja opened his senses. They really weren’t as good as they used to be, but it’s not like he needed much. Some branches crackling in the distance. Something steel sliding against leather. A bush brushing past something.

Aldrich seemed to hear it, too. He raised four fingers. Doc shook his head and raised six.

Six men.

Doc smirked at Aldrich, who nodded. Then, Doc vanished.

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 19, 2021

“Who the hell was stupid enough to make a fire in these woods anyway?” Trevor Ten-Fingers thought to himself.

Trevor pushed aside another bush with his machete. This was great news, anyway. Whoever these morons were, they lit up their part of the woods nice and bright that anyone would have seen them. Hell, they might as well have waved a sign saying “Hey! Come rob me!”

Hm. Maybe the Fang-Man would like to have a taste of these guys too.

Trevor smirked. Yeah, all he would need to do is take these dumbasses. Today wouldn’t be a total loss for him. Maybe the Fang-Man would promote him over One-Eye Ishmael. Honestly, fuck One-Eye Ishmael. Back when they were making their bandit names, Ishmael suggested that everyone go with the classic naming scheme, missing body parts and all. Ishmael was the one who pointed out Trevor had nothing missing.

“He even has all ten of his fingers!” Ishmael laughed, as if losing parts of your body was something to be proud of.

Well, joke’s on Ishmael. After Fang-Man promotes him, Trevor was gonna turn him into No-Eyes Ishmael. Or even No-Head Ishmael.

Trevor would have liked to elaborate further on what other nicknames he could give Ishmael, but his thoughts were interrupted by a fine leather loafer to the face.

***

Aldrich swallowed nervously as he leaned against the tree. He knew he gave the doctor a confident smile, but he really didn’t know he was going to disappear like that. Apparently, ninjas are just the best at disappearing. When was Aldrich supposed to strike? What even was a ninja, anyway?

Fool of a boy, Aldrich called himself silently. Now that there was actual danger, the doctor had just left Aldrich to die. The man pretended to care about Aldrich, acting like Aldrich’s depression was going to affect the mission, and then ran away when it mattered.

Aldrich exhaled deeply, attempting to center himself. He listened to the wind sashay the leaves above him.

Wait, there was no wind. What was moving the leaves, then?

No time for that. He could hear breathing. There was someone on the other side of the tree. Across the fire, Aldrich’s eyes met another bandit’s eyes.

Okay, now’s good enough, Aldrich supposed.

The bandit behind Aldrich’s tree was the closest, so Aldrich spun out from the front of it and smacked the bandit across the chest. The bandit looked surprised and terrified at first, then paused in confusion. After all, the bandit was wearing leather armor.

“Was that supposed to be- WHOA!”

The vapor around the bandit’s armor quivered, and suddenly the bandit launched backwards, flying uncontrollably into the brush behind him. After hearing his target thud painfully into something, Aldrich spun around again and pointed at the bandit he made eye contact with.

That bandit was sprinting towards Aldrich, making this easier. As soon as the bandit’s left foot landed on the ground, Aldrich made a motion as if to pull a rope. On cue, a puddle formed under the bandit’s foot and, almost like a piece of rope, wrapped around the attacker’s ankle. Suddenly, the bandit was flat on his ass.

Aldrich formed a spear out of water and shoved it through the bandit’s neck. The attacker was ugly, and had only one eye. He was uglier still as he started bleeding and choking immediately. Aldrich flinched and released the spear, leaving a gaping hole in the bandit’s throat.

The doctor was right. This felt terrible.

But this was no time to zone out. There were still four other men, apparently, but none of them had actually shown up. But now that Aldrich was listening, he could hear some grunts and thuds behind a brush.

Aldrich waved his hands into formation, making his fingers appear to quiver as if they were submerged in rippling water. He carefully approached the shaking in the bush, ready to strike at any moment.

“Hey!”

A familiar face - rather, lack of face - appeared from the bush as Dr. McNinja popped out of the bush, his eyes smiling goofily. Aldrich yelped and let his spell fly. Before it could actually hurt Doc, though, Aldrich released the spell, making the water splash harmlessly against Doc’s face.

Aldrich was delighted, though he didn’t let his face betray it. What a relief that Aldrich had read the man completely wrong. After all, he did prove his worth against the ant-bears. Well, Aldrich did always assume the worst of people.

Dr. McNinja, however, was not as pleased about the situation.

“I have… no change of clothes,” Doc said, unamused.

“I apologize, I didn’t know it was you.”

“It’s fine. You can dry me off, right?”

Aldrich looked around. “What happened to the other four?”

“Knocked ‘em out, nice and quiet,” Doc said, wiping the moisture from his coat like it would help at all. “Nice work with those two-“

An unfamiliar voice suddenly rang out, “Ah, ah, ah. Not so fast.”

Doc and Aldrich whipped around to face the speaker. It was one of the bandits, but with a giant footprint outlined in his face. The pair were about to attack the lone bandit before they saw who the brigand was holding. Garrick, arms bound with rope, continued to struggle against the bandit’s grip. But he couldn’t struggle too much, lest he cut himself on the machete against his neck. Doc grimaced. This was that first guy with the weird smile, the one he kicked in the face.

“Okay, I thought that a kick would be enough,” the physician admitted, “That’s on me.”

“No, Doctor,” Aldrich sighed, “it’s on Garrick for thinking he could go foraging in enemy territory.”

“Me?!” Garrick shouted, “I was gone for nearly two hours! Why the fuck weren’t you looking for me?”

Doc and Aldrich glanced at each other. Oh, yeah. They totally forgot about him.

“Quiet!” the bandit commanded. Doc, while unimpressed, crossed his arms and shut up regardless.

“Now, by the looks of it, you know this one. Well, I promise you right now, I will gut this one like a fish. I will spill his blood over these cursed woods and feed you to the ant-bears.”

“Ugh, I forgot about the ant-bears,” Garrick groaned. He grunted again as the bandit pressed his machete harder against the boy’s neck.

“Now,” the bandit continued, “You killed One-Eye Ishmael-“

“You did?” Doc said to Aldrich. The boy couldn’t tell if Doc was impressed or horrified.

“SHUT UP!” the bandit screamed. “As I was saying, you killed One-Eye Ishmael, who was a twat, so I’m gonna show you mercy. Instead of killing you, I’m just going to present you to the Fang-Man.”

“Fang-Man’s your boss?” Aldrich asked.

“How the hell is taking us to your boss the merciful option?” Doc snarked.

“ENOUGH QUESTIONS! I’LL KILL THE KID! I MEAN IT!”

Doc and Aldrich gave each other an unimpressed glance, then raised their hands. The bandit continued.

“You’re gonna lie down on the ground. Right now. RIGHT NOW!”

The other two sighed. Doc shrugged at Garrick, who rolled his eyes. The two of them knelt on the ground, Doc slightly hesitant to dirty his drenched but otherwise flawlessly white labcoat.

“Come on, we don’t have all day.”

“Yeah, yeah. Ugh, now I’m gonna be all muddy...”

Doc lay down on the ground. Aldrich looked at him, slightly worried.

“Sounds like you can get us out of this, right?” the boy whispered.

“Oh yeah, no problem. As soon as he lets go of Garrick-“

“QUIT WHISPERING!” the bandit snarled, “Alright, now I’m gonna tie your hands together. You’re gonna… You’re gonna…”

Doc frowned. He couldn’t quite see what was going on, or what was slowing the bandit down so much.

“You’re gonna…” The bandit’s voice slurred and slowed down. “What are these… pretty lights?”

Doc met Aldrich’s confused gaze with his own. He risked a glance at the bandit. The man was waving his hand in front of his eyes, as if something invisible was floating in front of them. Garrick was staring at him, also confused. Aldrich, noticing that Doc was now starting to get up, also looked up.

“What the hell?” Garrick muttered.

Aldrich looked at McNinja. “What’s going on?”

“Hell if I know,” Doc responded, “Sir, is everything okay-”

Without any warning, a thousand needles sprouted on the man’s face. Equally suddenly, there was a glint of light (which Doc recognized as some sort of stealthy string), followed by all ten of the man’s fingers dropping to the ground. Garrick yelped and doubled back in horror.

“What the hell was that?” Garrick stammered.

“I think we just got bigger-fished,” Doc answered, sword drawn. “Let me get those ropes-“

“Who are you calling bigger?”

The sword Doc was holding suddenly started glowing red. Too late, Doc realized that the steel was getting heated up. With a yelp, Doc dropped it. The blade was simmering with intense heat, but didn’t catch the surrounding leaves with fire. Dr. McNinja rolled his eyes at the sight. Magic.

Meanwhile, Aldrich was preparing for his next spell. In prompt response, a needle flew out from a nearby bush. It deflected off of the back of Aldrich’s hand, making him wave his hand in irritation. It seemed to do little to break his concentration, but a few seconds later, the teen’s hands both dropped limply to his sides.

“I can’t-” Aldrich grunted, “I can’t move my hands.”

“It’s fine!” Doc said, approaching him, “It’s probably pressure point shenanigans. I can loosen up your nervous system real qui-”

Doc felt a tiny presence on the bridge of his nose, barely felt, almost like a mosquito bite. In fact, Doc slapped it as if it was a bug bite. But soon, Doc felt his own legs buckle beneath him, and he collapsed onto the ground, face-first. Next to him, Aldrich was also collapsing.

“You know,” Doc mumbled through the dirt, “I should have seen that coming. Garrick?”

“Mmpf?” Garrick said, his face slumped against a nearby tree. Oof. That looked painful.

Doc sighed, struggling to move his head so he could see. “Figured as much. Okay, who dis?”

Hovering over the bushes surrounding their camp were about half a dozen tiny little purple-skinned humanoids with blue hair. They were naked except for their tasteful loincloths that were probably the size of Doc’s fingernails. They seemed to be hovering by flapping what looked like dragonfly wings growing from their shoulderblades. Their eyes were completely black, and disturbingly wide on their tiny faces, leaving little room for their stubby noses. Their mouths seemed to follow their chin line, making them inhumanly wide

“Pixies,” Aldrich mumbled.

“Oh, good,” Doc mumbled back, “Because what we needed on this vampire hunt was more supernatural things.”

One of the pixies, who Doc assumed was the leader of this pack, hovered down to Doc’s eye level. It was wearing a strange and lumpy white hat that kept swaying back and forth. Doc had to strongly resist comparing the thing to a Smurf.

“You appear to be the leader of your kind,” the pixie said. When it spoke, it almost sounded like the chitter of insects were overlaid on top of its words. Doc stared in horror at the pixie’s open mouth, which revealed its three rows of very tiny yellow teeth.

“Leader of this gang, I guess,” Doc responded, “Um… we come in peace?”

“Ha!” the pixie chortled bitterly, “HA! The largefolk says it comes in peace!”

The other pixies started laughing along, hovering in what appeared to be a perfect circle around the trio. The paralyzed Pellbrook boys watched them, creeped out by the gargling noise and insect chitter that accompanied their laughter. Doc, meanwhile, continued to stare at the pixie speaking to him.

“Big words for a big beastie,” the leader pixie chortled, “A big beastie that tramples through our woods, over our villages, abuses our fae ring portals… and as of two weeks ago, kidnaps our KINGS!”

The pixies stopped laughing, and started baring their teeth and hissed. Garrick recoiled at the one closest to him, apparently just noticing their teeth. Doc looked up at them with innocent eyes.

“Wow, they’re such a good audience,” he quipped.

“Silence!” the pixie shouted (its voice’s volume still pretty small), “You lie here with the following charges: invading our clearly marked fae circle, kidnapping our king, invading the circle again, and then kidnapping the king’s STEED. What say you to these charges?”

“Garrick,” Doc sighed, “Did you kidnap their king?”

“Mno!”

“How about their mushrooms?”

“I didn’t see any!”

“And Aldrich’s been with me this entire time,” Doc said, “And we didn’t mess with any pixies or mushrooms. So it wasn’t us. Right, Aldrich?”

Aldrich didn’t respond.

Doc frowned. “...right, Aldrich?”

“Was the king’s steed,” Aldrich mumbled, “perhaps a rabbit? In a ring of mushrooms?”

“Yes!” the leader pixie exclaimed, “The noble Snowy Snuffykins.”

Garrick chortled. “Your king’s steed is called Snowy Snuffykins?”

“Kings, you are chatty,” the pixie sighed, “What did you do to Snuffykins, foul giant?”

Doc and Aldrich turned to each other uneasily. Finally, Doc turned to the pixie.

“We might,” Doc admitted, “have eaten Snowy Snuffykins.”

The pixies all gasped in abject horror. The leader pixie cried out in anguish, then started stomping (to no effect) on Doc’s cheek.

“You will pay for your BARBARIC crimes!” the leader screamed, then stopped. It seemed to compose itself before continuing. “But first… Where is King Orilay?”

Doc looked at Garrick expectantly. Garrick looked at Aldrich, then back at Doc. He made what Doc assumed was the approximation of a shrug, given his condition.

The pixie shrieked in frustration. “We can’t even open our fae portals to return home, so we can leave this pathetic plane of existence you bigfeet call home!”

“Our feet are not that big,” Doc replied.

“SO WHERE IS KING ORILAY?”

Dr. McNinja cleared his throat. “Okay we for real don’t know anything about your pixie king-”

“LIES!” the pixie hollered, stabbing at Doc’s eye with its tiny little spear. Doc managed to close his eye before the spear actually pierced his eye. Still hurt, though.

“OW!” Doc exclaimed.

“We know you largefolk are all liars and cheats!” the pixie hissed, “There is only one way to ensure you tell the truth.”

The pixie leaned in with its spear, pressing it against the bottom of Doc’s eyeball. Doc, with no small amount of trepidation, realized the pixie was aiming with astonishing accuracy at his trigeminal nerve.

“Tell me,” the pixie whispered, “your name.”

Doc blinked a bit. “Oh. That’s it?”

“No, don’t-” Aldrich started.

“Doctor McNinja,” Doc said.

Aldrich and Garrick sighed in despair. Doc blinked, confused.

“Why?” Doc said, “It’s just my name. It’s fine. Dr. McNinja.”

The leader pixie cackled, prompting the rest of its gang to cackle as well. Once again, the air was filled with unpleasant chittering sounds. Aldrich sighed again.

“The fae need your name to cast their magic,” Aldrich explained, “Now that you’ve given it your name, it’s going to enslave you.”

“Silence, mortal!” the leader pixie screamed, before turning to Doc, who was looking on in horror. “Very well, Doctor, son of McNinja. Kill your companions!”

With a click of its fingers, the pixie started whistling strange intonations. Doc felt his arms move as whatever incantation held him went away. Stunned, he slowly rose to his feet, lifting his sword, which was conveniently no longer burning with heat. The Pellbrook boys looked in terror as the doctor turned their eyes to look at them…

And then back at the pixies.

“Um,” Doc said, “No?”

The leader pixie blinked for a second, before zipping closer to Doc’s face.

“What do you mean, no?”

“I don’t… want to?” Doc said, “I mean, you’re probably just gonna kill me afterwards anyway, so I dunno why I would kill these kids. Not really a lot of incentive for me.”

The pixie snarled. “Doctor McNinja, I order you to kill-”

“Again, not super interested,” Doc replied, “And confused.”

“Impossible!” the pixie said, “I sensed it! That was your true name! You strange mortals have two names, right?”

“Sometimes more,” Doc admitted, “But yeah, I got a first and last name.”

“And you said them!” the faerie shouted.

“Ohhhhh,” Doc said, finally understanding, “Noooo, Doctor isn’t my first name. That’s my title.”

“Then what’s your first name?!”

Doc inhaled sharply between his teeth, an apologetic expression on his face. “Yeah, I can’t. I got my name cursed away. It’s a long story. See, there was this wizard and-”

“Forget this,” the pixie groaned, “Put him down again!”

Unbeknownst to the fae, Doc was actually spending that time analyzing the pixies. As far as he could tell, there were a bunch more hiding in the bushes, presumably as back-up. This would be tricky, since they were so small, but Doc felt confident he could probably take them all out.

A needle flew towards him from an unseen assailant, but Doc saw it this time. He deflected it with his sword, ducking and weaving between an array of airborne spears. He used his sword to swat at the leader. Perhaps creating distance between himself and the creatures was a bad idea, but Doc’s eye STILL hurt a lot.

The pixie soared off into the woods, screeching the whole way. Meanwhile, Doc twirled in the air, dodging another wave of needles and spears. Despite his trained agility, Doc couldn’t avoid all of them, but thankfully most of the needles appeared to be pine needles and deflected harmlessly against his labcoat. He raised his arm to cover his eyes while he backflipped. His feet landed against a tree. Doc used it to kick off, launching himself at a pixie with sword extended.

The pixie yelped and zipped to the side to avoid him. However, Doc was expecting as much. As he flew through the air, he reached into his jacket to find his ninja stars.

Aw, god dammit, he just had some shamrocks.

Doc clicked his tongue in irritation as he threw them anyway, spinning in mid-air. Because of his rapid movements, the pixies evidently couldn’t figure out what he was exactly doing. Two pairs of shamrocks spun out from the whirl of black-and-white, each embedding deep into a pixie.

Doc landed on his feet, flinging his sword at the pixie who dodged him earlier. The pixie tried to fly out of the way, but got caught regardless. Doc jumped into the air again, finding his footing on a sturdy branch, while throwing out his grappling hook. It found Doc’s sword and wrapped around it. Doc yanked on the cable while jumping again, and caught the sword mid-air. The other pixies, who probably were just now processing that Dr. McNinja was this fast, started panicking and throwing their spears in a hurry.

Sloppy. Doc pulled on his labcoat as he fell, covering his torso with the oddly protective thick fabric. Meanwhile, he used his other arm to guard his face. Right before he landed, he spun mid-air, dragging the sword in a deadly arc of steel. The last three fae shrieked as they also flew off.

“Doc!” Aldrich shouted, evidently still paralyzed, “What’s your sword made of?”

Dr. McNinja looked at him curiously. “What?”

“What metal is it?”

Doc shrugged. “Steel? I don’t know. Why?”

It was Garrick’s turn to shout. “Fae are immune to metals that aren’t iron!”

Dr. McNinja snickered. “Wait, what? Does it really matter? I hit them really hard. And plus, steel is mostly iron anyway-”

Doc was interrupted by another flurry of spears, which he was too slow to catch. They embedded themselves as well as they could into Doc’s ninja mask, which is to say, not very well. However, they were apparently tipped with the same poison that paralyzed Doc earlier. Well, that was his guess.

Doc collapsed onto the ground, grumbling. The three pixies Doc had just knocked back buzzed forward, hissing menacingly. Behind them, the leader was snarling with glowing blue eyes.

“You have offended us for the last time,” the leader screeched, “You have killed two more of our number and must pay the pri-”

The leader hesitated, shuffling uncomfortably in place. The other fae looked at their leader, confused.

“You must pay-” the pixie tried again, but stopped again. “You must- You must pay- oh Kings, oh Kings it HURTS!”

The leader was gripping its head, having dropped its spear. The other fae started to twitch as well. Doc watched with no small amount of confusion.

“Oh KINGS!” the leader screeched, “OH MY PENIS!”

“What,” Doc mumbled.

“SOMETHING IS STABBING MY PENIS FROM THE INSIDE!” the pixie screamed, “PLEASE! SOMEONE HELP ME-”

The other three pixies released one final screech before the blood beneath their skin started bubbling up disturbingly, stretching their skin in ways that it clearly wasn’t meant to be stretched. Their eyes started to bloat, and their wings fell off as the pixies all dropped onto the ground.

Then they exploded in a horrifying display of blood. Some of it fell onto Doc’s face, and Doc screamed both in horror and in pain. The blood was boiling.

The leader, however, was still alive, but clearly not for much longer. With another final scream, it dropped to the ground, its own eyes starting to glaze over as frost crawled up its face.

Doc felt his paralysis wear off again. He immediately jumped to his feet, brandishing his sword again, eyes wide with horror.

“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT” Doc hollered, waving his sword around.

Aldrich, meanwhile, had already cut Garrick’s bonds. He nodded to somebody behind Doc, causing the doctor to whirl around and strike at whoever was behind him.

The person in question yelped as the butt of Doc’s sword collided with his cheekbone, causing him to immediately fall over, gripping his head.

“Oh my God,” Doc said, squinting at him, “Wait, where have I seen you?”

Aldrich sighed. “Dr. McNinja, you remember our brother Oswin?”

Doc looked from Aldrich to Oswin. His eyes widened, this time with a hint of recognition. Oswin rubbed his cheek, which was already starting to bruise.

“Ouch,” Oswin murmured.

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18586 / 10000 words

Dr. McNinja · Oct 19, 2021

Where Dr. McNinja had stowed a plastic pack of ice was a mystery to all three of the Pellbrook boys at the camp. Nevertheless, Oswin was currently pressing it against his jaw where Doc had struck him the night before.

Meanwhile, Doc was stitching up Garrick, who had suffered a few lacerations at the hands of the bandits. Aldrich was rubbing his hand, which had swollen like a bee sting, but was starting to settle down after Doc treated it. Doc’s own face had already returned to normal around ten minutes ago, despite the significantly larger dose he received.

“Sorry again about the, you know,” Doc muttered.

“It’s fine,” Oswin replied, surprisingly cheerful for someone who was just struck with a heavy metal weapon. “Not worse than what you guys got.”

Doc eyed the bush, which hid the corpses from the night before. It felt disrespectful to put the bandits’ corpses in the same pile as the pixies, so Doc had dragged the two dead men about four meters to the west, and Aldrich placed the mutilated pixie leader and the two that Doc had killed in a different bush. Garrick just kinda kicked up the dirt around the boiled pixies to cover their entrails.

The other bandits, meanwhile, were watching in horror at these four adventurers. With Oswin’s help, Dr. McNinja tied up the bandits in a circle around a sturdy tree with a rope, gagging them all with another rope. Doc figured these brigands weren’t used to people fighting back, let alone a ninja and three people with magic. Well, this ought to be easy.

Doc pulled one last time on the needle, and the surgical string slid across the wounds. Garrick hissed in pain, and Doc patted his shoulder.

“You’re all done,” Doc said, cutting the string off with his sword.

“Thanks,” Garrick said.

“Mhm,” Doc said, strolling over towards their prisoners. He turned to Oswin. “Let me see your bruise?”

Oswin removed the ice pack, which had somehow stayed frozen during the night. Oh, right. Magic. Welp, there was no swelling in the cheek, which was progress. The flesh was tender, but there was no reason for actual concern.

“Okay, that’s as good as we’re gonna get for now,” Doc said, offering his hand to Oswin. The boy clasped the doctor’s hand with a grin, and McNinja helped him to his feet. “Welcome to the party, Oswin.”

“Thanks!” Oswin replied.

Seriously, ever since the kid arrived, he was a goddamn delight. Which made him even creepier, Doc figured. He still remembered that show of brutality vividly enough. The smell of burning blood in the camp certainly wasn’t helping. The least that Oswin could do was to at least act like he was a disturbed and violent individual.

But here was this kid, perfectly fine. In fact, he seemed even more courteous than he did when the killing wasn’t happening.

A genuine psychopath, huh?

“How was Blythe’s condition when you left?” Doc asked.

Oswin’s face fell grim, but he retained his smile.

“She’s about as fine as she could be, I suppose,” the boy replied, “She was asleep when I left yesterday.”

“Dead, he means,” Doc thought to himself, “Or in an unwakeable coma. We have until tonight.”

He looked at Aldrich and Garrick. In the wake of the attack the night before, both of them were unable to rest. They looked exhausted, their eyes unfocused and half-open. Their movements were sluggish. Doc himself wasn’t doing great, either; he would’ve loved to take a quick nap.

But their situation was grim. Even if Doc had the cure ready, right now, it’d be really tight driving as fast as he could to the Pellbrook estate. And not only did they not have the cure ready, they hadn’t even found Peter yet.

Well, that last part could be easily fixed, Doc supposed.

Perhaps Doc’s newfound pessimism came from the new intel they learned yesterday. The dead bandit referred to his boss as “the Fang-Man”. It was pretty clear what he could be referring to. Dr. McNinja wasn’t quite sure what he was expecting, but he certainly knew what he was hoping for. He had hoped that Peter wasn’t actually leading the attacks.

Because if he was, then Doc would have to stop him by any means.

Dr. McNinja shook the thought out of his head. He knew from experience that, when it counted, he could kill a vampire reliably. He’d suffer from the guilt afterwards, and eventually, shake it off. Hell, this is what he was ostensibly here for, anyway.

The physician slowly and menacingly crept towards the tied-up bandits. They started to squirm as Doc approached them with his weapon drawn. With as threatening a glare as he could muster, Doc raised his sword. The other bandits started squealing, resisting against their gags to cry for mercy.

With a deft movement, Doc slashed down.

The bandits opened their eyes to realize none of them were dead. In fact, one of them had been ungagged. The bandit in question wriggled their jaw, presumably to stretch the soreness away. Doc knelt next to him, and though the bandit was quivering in fear, Doc didn’t actually say anything, just staring into his soul. After a few terrifying seconds, Doc finally spoke.

“There are two ways we can do this. The hard way, where this kid turns the blood in your dick into icicles and stabs you from the inside. Or the easy way-”

“EASY WAY!” the bandit cried, “Oh Gods, please, the easy way. I’ll tell you whatever you need. Please, oh Gods, just not the kid.”

Doc blinked in surprise. He stood up cheerfully. That was easy.

“Okay, cool,” Doc said, “Where’s the Fang-Man?”

The bandit turned to his compatriots, who were all shaking their head. Doc rolled his eyes.

“Ugh, fine. Oswin?”

Oswin started waving his hands, and the bandit screamed in protest.

“NO NO NO I’LL TELL YOU”

Doc raised his hand and closed it into a fist. Oswin stopped waving his hands as the physician knelt again.

“Listen, buddy, I’m really late for my next appointment, so I’d like to cut the whole interrogation thing pretty short,” Doc sighed, “Really don’t have time for the whole back-and-forth. Where’s the Fang-Man?”

“Four caves to the right of the big river! It’s got ant-bear tracks around it, but the whole cave smells like lemons!” the bandit wept, “There’s a small orange stream coming out of it! You can’t miss it! Oh Gods please, I swear!”

Doc tilted his head. “Why lemons?”

“Lemons ward off the ant-bears! They can’t stand the smell!” the bandit shouted.

“Is there a special code or something we’ll need to enter?” Aldrich asked.

The bandit frantically shook his head. “Fang-Man knows everyone in the crew. And they’ll notice we’ve been gone. There’s about ten more guys in the cave, and they’ll know you’re coming.”

“And who is this Fang-Man?” Doc said.

“He doesn’t tell anyone his name,” the bandit whimpered, “We know he’s good at water magic and he became a vampire two weeks ago, but we didn’t know anything about him until he killed our boss and took over! But he’s scary as shit, man. He’ll kill you for looking at him wrong.”

Dr. McNinja sighed.

“When you get in the cave, there’s a fork in the road,” the bandit continued, “The left is where we sleep, the right is the prison and Fang-Man’s room. He doesn’t let anyone in there. Now, please, let us go! We’ll turn ourselves in! We won’t hurt anyone else please oh Gods-”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Doc sighed, “We’ll be back for you once we deal with Fang-Man Peter.”

Before the bandit could say anything else, Doc abruptly wrapped another rope around his mouth and gagged him. He whimpered, and now that Doc was closer, he could see that the bandits’ pants were collectively very wet.

“Eugh,” Doc commented, “Alright, fourth cave to the right from the big river. Let’s go, boys. Please don’t step on any mushroom circles, or mess with any fae portals. We don’t have that kind of time.”

Dr. McNinja sheathed his sword and started lightly jogging towards the cliff side. With naught but a quick glance at each other, the three Pellbrook boys rushed after him, leaving their tent behind with the whimpering bandits.

Garrick turned around one last time.

“And if we see any of you ever again, Oswin will show you his newest trick,” Garrick taunted with a cackle, “And it’s extra painful. You don’t even die right away-”

“Garrick!”

“Coming, Doc!” Garrick hollered back as he sprinted forward.

The bandits fell quiet as the party left. One of them fainted right away.

***

Doc took a big sniff. The intel was sound. This cave was hard to see from where they were camped. Well, it looked like it was a shallow cave, but turned hard to the right. A strangely orange stream was pouring out of it, contrasting with the nearly-white grey stone walls. And the whole thing reeked of citrus.

Dr. McNinja stared at the hallways in front of him. Like the bandit said, two tunnels. Garrick watched Doc with visible confusion.

“Well?” Garrick said, “To the right?”

“Peter knows we’re coming,” Doc mumbled, “And he would know that his subordinates are likely to give up the inner workings of his lair. He might be waiting for us to go in the right tunnel so he can flank us from the left.”

“So we split up,” Oswin mumbled.

Aldrich shook his head. “We’re not supposed to split up when we’re dealing with vampires.”

Doc squinted. “Actually, maybe it might be okay. Even if we split up, there’ll be two of us in each group. If we go in as one group, we’ll get caught in the middle of what’s pretty obviously a trap. But if we do a pincer attack, then each group will have their share of bandits against the wall.”

Dr. McNinja paced as he thought out loud, keeping his voice low to not alert the ones inside the cave.

“So the dilemma is where Peter is hiding. It’s daylight out, so he has to be in one of these two tunnels. He’s definitely trapped, but in which tunnel… And who to send where…”

Garrick started swaying back and forth, seemingly to entertain himself while waiting for Doc’s judgement. Aldrich and Oswin, for their part, were standing patiently still, though Aldrich did steal nervous, tired glances at Doc. Whatever. Focus up, Doc.

Vampires, especially those who knew magic in their living days, tended to be proficient in spells that can charm victims. They are also naturally skilled in the art of stealthy Given these factors, Doc needed people with sharp minds eyes. So far, the relatively well-rested Oswin would serve well. Also, Oswin seemed to be the most emotionally resilient of the three. If Doc learned anything these past few days, it was that Aldrich and Garrick were complete emotional messes.

What else? Doc knew that Garrick’s skills were best suited to deal with the mortal bandits. From what he could gather, Peter wasn’t sharing his darke gyft or whatever. Garrick was a bit of an unrefined punch to the face, which Doc knew would be ineffective against Peter.

Doc was hoping to depend on Aldrich a bit for the upcoming fight with Peter, since Aldrich was unlikely to have too many moral quandaries that could get him killed. But Doc had forced the kid into a moral quandary after last night’s conversation, which was, in hindsight, unwise. Also, dude looked REALLY tired, even more so than Garrick. Made sense, since Garrick was used to staying up all night.

Ideally, Doc would take Aldrich AND Oswin, but that would leave Garrick all alone. What if they were wrong and Peter was in the other tunnel? If Peter were to completely turn Garrick and he were to become a vampire, it would be disastrous.

He knew Aldrich and Garrick were good at fighting alongside each other, from firsthand experience. They’d also cancel each other out. Doc really didn’t need them arguing, but it seemed that they were reliable when it counted.

And so, it was settled.

“Oswin, you’re with me. We’re gonna take down Peter. I have to assume this is an obvious bait-and-switch situation, so we’re going left,” Doc said, “Aldrich, Garrick, go to the right. The bandits are probably hiding there, expecting to take out the vampire hunters. When the bandits come out, make another cave-in like we did last time. Stay on the defense. Remember what I taught you with the rice.”

As Doc talked, he handed out the bottle of garlic oil spray again. Garrick sprayed himself, causing Aldrich to recoil at the pungent smell.

Doc continued, “Watch each other’s backs. I MEAN IT. Peter will try to sneak up from behind, so you need to keep your backs to each other and keep an eye on any angle. We’re in his territory, in his ideal conditions. Stay sharp, and go in quiet. Any questions?”

Oswin raised his hand. “What’s with the rice?”

Doc sighed. “I’ll explain it on the way. And plus, you should focus more on your spells. I’ll deal with the esoteric details. Anything else?”

Garrick and Aldrich shook their heads. Oswin looked unsure, but didn’t say anything. Doc nodded. He stealthily covered his hands in holy oil, and affectionately grabbed the back of Aldrich and Garrick’s necks. They flinched at the surprisingly greasy touch of Doc’s fingers, but accepted the gesture. That should protect them, just in case.

“Oh, one last thing. Vampires are burnt by running water,” Doc said, “Now, I’ve experimented with just spilling some water on vampires, but that doesn’t work. It needs to be like a stream or river. I don’t know if you guys can make an artificial river, but that’s what it would need.”

Aldrich and Garrick nodded. “We can do that,” Aldrich said

God, this was a bad idea.

“Good luck, boys,” Doc said, “If it’s getting too choppy, there’s no shame in doubling back for us. Stay alive.”

And with that, Aldrich and Garrick started creeping down the hallway. Oswin gave Doc an optimistic smile, despite the terror in his eyes.

“Right,” Doc said, “So vampires have some odd-sounding weaknesses…”

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20978 / 10000 words

Dr. McNinja · Oct 20, 2021

ACT III

These tunnels were far longer than Dr. McNinja expected. It had gotten so dark, in fact, that Doc had resorted to using a torch. Compared to the others, this cave lacked stalactites and stalagmites. In fact, Doc casually noticed that many of them seemed to have been torn off their “roots”. Oswin had noted that if he didn’t know better, he would say that they looked like they were snapped in half by hand, like carrots. Doc, unfortunately, did know even better that that was very much the case. Vampires were strong.

Otherwise, the cave was fairly nondescript. The walls were lined with a slippery, slimy substance, which was likely just water. It glistened in the torchlight. The rock in the wall itself looked like it was made of a non-soluble chalk-like substance. Doc couldn’t help but wish that he could remember his Geology doctorate paper. Back home, Doc probably could’ve identified these rocks to distract himself from how much danger he put those other two kids in.

In the ten minutes that Doc and Oswin crept along the cave, Dr. McNinja was heavily regretting splitting the party. Now, if something were to happen to the other boys, Doc couldn’t help them at all. Whatever. The left path was a pretty obvious trap, and Doc felt more comfortable setting it off himself. He would’ve left Oswin with the other two as well, but Doc also didn’t particularly feel like dying today.

“It’s still pretty bright in here,” Oswin said, “I can still see the sunlight behind us.”

“Mm,” Doc said, before focusing on his thoughts again.

Hm. Maybe this whole thing was a mistake.

In his anxious despair, Doc turned to Oswin, who was marching along like a trooper. But Doc could tell the kid was scared. And why wouldn’t he be? He was only 15.

Oh God he was only 15

Dr. McNinja scowled deeply. He had spent so much time with his kid sidekick Gordito in his home world, he seemed to have forgotten that most children weren’t badass gunslingers with thick skin. Still, Oswin was doing pretty good for someone who was clearly very scared.

“Hey, Oswin,” Doc said.

“Mhm?”

“You okay?”

Oswin gave Doc a grin. “Fine.”

Dr. McNinja returned the smile, and patted Oswin on the shoulder. The kid was definitely not fine. No time to send him back, though. He would have to work twice as hard to keep Peter’s attention, and hope Oswin would back him up from a distance.

“Listen, kid,” Doc muttered, “When we get to the room, like I said, we’re going back-to-back. Once I get eyes on Peter, though, I want you to hang back and let me deal with it.”

“Oh, you don’t need to worry about me, Doctor,” Oswin replied, “I’ll do my part.”

“No, seriously,” Doc argued, “Stay at my back. I can’t risk you getting hurt too.”

“I accepted this mission,” Oswin argued back, “And I won’t abandon it.”

Oswin maintained his determined smile, but Doc could see him shaking as he walked forward. Doc cleared his throat.

“Well, at the very least, can you not make him explode or whatever?” Doc said, “I need his blood sample to help Blythe.”

Oswin shrugged. “Alright, but Mama told me to kill him after you get what you need. Will he have enough blood in his body to boil?”

Dr. McNinja turned to look at Oswin.

“You… were going to explode your own brother?”

“It’s efficient,” Oswin said with a smile, “But only if there’s enough blood in him to do that. I know you’re an expert on vampires, so I thought I’d ask.”

Doc blinked, thoroughly creeped out. But… seeing Oswin shiver like that, there was definitely something about the kid.

Ugh. What was Doc thinking? Of course Oswin was also having psychological troubles. Why would it just be Aldrich and Garrick? Well, Doc would have to make do. He didn’t have time to help Oswin work through his problems right now, but he made a mental note to refer Ariel to some good psychiatrists.

Meanwhile, Doc had to make sure Oswin didn’t kill Peter prematurely.

“I wouldn’t risk it,” Doc told Oswin after some thought, “It depends on how recently he fed. And anyway, I’d rather keep him alive and captured for the meanwhile so we can make sure there aren’t any loose ends. There are reliable ways of capturing vampires alive temporarily.”

Oswin took the information seriously, and nodded.

“That is,” Doc thought to himself, “if Peter is the one at the end of this hall.”

The pair crept for a few minutes longer. Doc was starting to get impatient, even picking up his pace at the expense of his stealth. Oswin kept up behind him, trying to keep his eyes on where they just walked. Good kid. Listening to instructions.

Doc suddenly stopped, causing Oswin to collide into him. Oswin looked up at Doc, who put a finger over his mouth. There was light coming from around the next bend in the tunnel. Probably the bandits’ barracks, where Peter was presumably hiding.

Dr. McNinja inhaled deeply but quietly to center himself. He made eye contact with Oswin, who was desperately trying to hide his terror with a determined expression. Doc pointed at his back with this thumb, then raised three fingers.

Three.

Two.

One.

Doc burst forward, two frozen shamrocks gripped between his left fingers, and his sword raised defensively in his right hand. He rolled on the wet but smooth ground, scanning the room rapidly for Peter.

Instead, he saw a small group of men huddled around what looked to be a cast-iron pot. The room was lined with bunks, as one would expect from a low-quality barracks in a cave.

“What the hell-“

Before they could respond, Doc got over his shock and flung the makeshift shuriken. They embedded themselves into the shoulder of one bandit as Doc surged forward, chopping at the next bandit’s knees. With little effort, Doc cut and crippled four of the unprepared men. He was about to deal with the rest when whatever stew was cooking in the pot splashed out, covering the other bandits. They screamed as the even more boiling stew covered their faces and chests, before the stew rapidly started freezing, forming elaborate ice crystals. They dropped immediately. Doc had to assume they were dead.

He turned to the bandit with the shamrocks in his shoulder, who was just starting to recover. The bandit was crawling towards a crossbow that was leaning against a nearby bunk. With little effort, Doc slung his grappling hook around the bandit’s ankles and started dragging the bandit away from the crossbow, causing the bandit to yelp and panic.

Doc grabbed the bandit’s shirt and lifted him up over the fire that was being used to cook. The bandit, eyes full of panic and incomprehension, started struggling, to no avail.

“Where is Peter Pellbrook?” Dr. McNinja said in his most menacing growl.

“OTHER TUNNEL, OTHER TUNNEL!” the bandit shouted.

Doc cursed loudly before throwing the bandit up in the air. Wordlessly, Doc punched his prey in the temple with the precise amount of force that would send him into a concussion. The bandit crumpled against the floor, unconscious.

Doc wound up the cable to his grappling hook as he started running. Oswin had already left to check on his brothers.

Doc cursed some more as he sprinted as fast as he could. Dammit.

“These idiot bandits had no idea that we were coming,” Doc thought to himself as he ran straight past Oswin with superhuman speed. “I overthought this. Again. Please be okay, please be okay, please be okay…”

After about five minutes of running, Doc arrived at the fork in the tunnels where the party had separated. He stopped in his tracks, almost slipping from how abruptly he stopped.

Garrick and Aldrich were roughly slumped against the wall, their forms incomprehensible mangled. Both of their faces were permanently stretched into expressions of horror and surprise, and their eyes stared pointlessly into nowhere.

Oswin arrived shortly after, and he audibly gasped at the gruesome sight. Doc turned around, breaking from his horrified trance. He gripped Oswin’s shoulders, trying to draw his gaze.

“Don’t look,” Doc said, “Turn around, Oswin. Don’t look.”

Oswin broke free, his eyes glued to his brothers’ bodies. He knelt besides Aldrich’s corpse and gently touched Aldrich’s cheek.

“Aldrich?” Oswin whispered in a barely perceptible voice, “Wake up, Aldrich.”

Doc swallowed hard. Shit.

“Wake up, guys,” Oswin said, “Come on. It’s not funny. Get up.”

Doc rubbed his eyes. Oswin kept trying to coax his brothers awake, unable to accept what happened.

He started thinking about his own mother again. How Mitzi McNinja would have reprimanded him for the clumsiness in his plan, that his own gentle spirit was what got these two boys killed. The irony of it didn’t escape him.

Dr. McNinja inhaled deeply. He opened his eyes again. The cave was dripping with tears, and Doc’s fists gripped so tightly he almost drew blood. His eyes stung, but he refused to close them again. Because McNinja had made a decision.

Peter Pellbrook was going to die today.

But first, Doc needed to know what he was up against.

The first thing he noticed was the trail of blood. Peter had killed these two in his own tunnel… which made sense. He had no idea Aldrich and Garrick were coming, so would have fended them off in his own chamber. So why drag them all the way out here? Doc looked at the entrance to the cave that led outside. The bodies were slumped behind a shadow, presumably because Peter didn’t want to enter the sunlight. Perhaps Peter just didn’t want these two to turn into vampires in his own chamber? A need for cleanliness?

No, because the blood trail was… almost deliberate. It painted a clear path, and there were no tracks in the blood. And upon closer examination, there were tiny pebbles that were coated in blood that followed the same trial-

Oh. Those weren’t pebbles. It was rice.

This was a message, then.

Doc silently snarled. Message received.

The next thing Doc needed to do was a quick autopsy. He knelt next to Oswin, gripping his shoulders tightly. The boy refused to leave, but Doc couldn’t hear what he was saying anymore. He shifted the teen to the side and started investigating the bodies.

The mangled and unnaturally bent limbs were to be expected. Vampires were incredibly strong, able to snap femurs like twigs. And to the unprofessional eye, that’d be the most interesting thing, but Doc knew what to look for.

There were signs of rotting flesh on their chests. Hm. Blythe was hit specifically with a necrotic spell, which resulted in similar symptoms. And yet, no bite marks, meaning no blood was drunk. Why was he leaving his victims like this? If a vampire threw out a body like this, it was because they had drained the body of its blood and were done with it. Otherwise, the body would turn into the vampire’s spawn, which most vampires treated like a person would their child.

But as was clear from both the blood trail and their bleeding wounds, these two had plenty of blood left. At the same time, they were so close to the sun. So Peter had no interest in having children… but also wasn’t drinking their blood? Even if Peter had fed recently, why wouldn’t he keep these two for emergency blood?

“Why isn’t he drinking their blood?” Doc said to himself out loud.

Hm. This investigation asked more questions than it answered, but the next step was still pretty clear.

“Oswin,” Doc muttered, “I need you to move these two outside.”

“And then you’ll fix them?” Oswin said.

“I’m sorry, Oswin,” Doc replied, “But I don’t have time for the denial phase right now. Move the bodies outside.”

Oswin stared in horror, then his face crumpled up. Doc interrupted him before the situation devolved any further.

“If you move them outside, they have a chance of recovering,” Doc lied, “The sunlight will naturally protect them against being turned into vampires, while the venom heals their body. Move quickly, and stay hidden. Don’t follow after me, these two will need your help when they wake up.”

Oswin nodded. Doc knew, in the back of his mind, that Oswin knew it was a lie. Nevertheless, Oswin grabbed Garrick’s broken arms and started tugging, dragging his twin brother outside.

Doc swallowed hard. Then, silent as the night, he ran deeper into the cave.

***

Oswin was currently waving away the flies that had been attracted to his brothers. He could only imagine what kind of annoyed expression Garrick would have if he were to learn that Oswin didn’t keep the flies from laying eggs in his body before he woke up.

There was no way that these two were dead. They couldn’t be. They were too tough for that.

Well, like Dr. McNinja said, the vampire venom would heal them or whatever.

The sun felt so cold today.

Actually… everything felt so cold right. It didn’t make sense. Oswin shivered as he felt chills crawl up his arm.

“Oswin…” a voice whispered behind him.

Oswin spun around. He met face-to-face with a familiar face. A face he’d seen since he was young, a face he’d tried to forget in the years since.

“You… can’t be here…” Oswin mumbled.

“Unbind me…” the person whispered, “And I will save your brothers…”

***

A heavy-set iron door sealed the room at the end of the tunnel, but Doc was barely slowed down. He drop-kicked the door, sending it flying off its hinges. Using his agility, Doc landed with a three-point landing, brandishing his blade.

“PETER PELLBROOK!” Doc hollered, scanning the room.

But he was nowhere to be seen. It was a large chamber, surprisingly furnished for the inside of a dank and wet cave. And dry, as well. There was what looked to be a Persian rug on the floor, which miraculously seemed to be in excellent condition. An electric chandelier hung from the ceiling, making Doc wonder what the hell kinda power source this cave had. Peter, with his affinity for modern tech, probably finagled something. In the corner was a king-sized bed with lovely silk sheets, which again were kept strangely dry.

Why would a vampire use a bed?

“And where the hell are you, Peter,” Doc muttered to himself.

There were several large dents in the wall, clearly carved by someone with great strength by the way the rock was cracked around it. The way they were arranged seemed to imply that they were akin to placements for altars, or trophies.

In one of them, Doc could see a marble pedestal, which held up a small object about the size of a forearm. He couldn’t see what it was, because it was covered with a large cloth. In the second, another object covered by a cloth, this time significantly larger and box-shaped.

In the third was an object which Doc surmised to be the size of a coffin. It was rattling harshly after Doc announced his presence.

Yeah, that was definitely a vampire.

Or maybe not. Maybe Peter was keeping a hostage. Doc had definitely seen cases of vampires that keep a person or two alive and bound like the victims were their personal blood cooler. Doc supposed Peter was hoping rescuing this hostage would slow him down. Which, obviously, it would.

If this WAS a vampire, Doc didn’t have the time nor patience to cure them.

Doc grit his teeth, drawing his stake and approaching the wriggling coffin-shaped object. That was fine. Made this easier for Doc.

McNinja raised the stake up, prepared to stab. Then, in a swift motion, Doc unfurled the cloth.

Dr. McNinja’s eyes widened in surprise.

“…Peter?”

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 20, 2021

It was unmistakable. Peter was the splitting image of Ariel Pellbrook, if Ariel was a male, teenaged living corpse with fangs and feral cat eyes. He had the family’s trademark orange-red hair, and would have the soft cheekbones that the Pellbrooks shared if they hadn’t been changed to fit Peter’s new vampire venom sacs. Peter struggled as hard as he could against what Doc was noticing were glowing iron manacles, which were attached to chains that were wrapped around Peter’s coffin. The poor kid was emaciated and sweating, which Doc didn’t even know vampires could do.

Ah. That wasn’t sweat. Above Peter, there was an upside down plastic bottle of water with a small tip that Doc recognized as the orange bottle cap to a glue bottle. It was taped to the top part of Peter’s coffin. A drop of water dangled tantalizingly from the tip. It dropped unceremoniously, and landed on Peter’s forehead. On contact, it sizzled on Peter’s skin, and Peter struggled twice as hard, screaming in pain. But he couldn’t generate much volume, because he was gagged with an iron bar chained tightly to his head. Doc recognized this as a supernatural way of making sure a vampire can’t bite you for at least a week.

Doc grabbed and observed the bottle. Warm to the touch, but cool all the same. Oh God. It was holy water. This was holy water torture.

Peter wasn’t keeping a hostage.

Peter was the hostage.

Doc ripped the bottle out of position, prompting Peter to give him a miserable but grateful look. Dr. McNinja prepared to cut off the gag that was sealing Peter.

“Who’s doing this to you-“

Suddenly, Peter screamed at Doc while looking at something behind him. Doc whirled around, just in time to see a gnarled fist rushing towards him.

Dr. McNinja threw his body back, narrowly dodging the superhumanly fast punch. He used his momentum to kick back into a flip, landing on his feet to get a better look at his assailant.

Gone.

Nobody human was that fast, not even a ninja. So this was another vampire, then. Doc was starting to put the pieces together when he heard gravel shift behind him.

How did the attacker get behind him so fast? Doc jumped forward to dodge what was apparently a kick, spinning around to get a good look at the assailant.

It was a man with large stature. He was completely covered from head-to-toe, and wearing a wooden mask which matched Ariel’s description. His raggedy cloak covered what appeared to be a lovely white collared shirt, a bow tie, and slacks. Was that a top hat he was wearing?

Doc couldn’t register much more information, as he was still in the air. In the middle of the airborne spin, Doc flung two more shamrocks at the man. He casually blocked the projectiles with his fingers.

Dr. McNinja got a better look at the target. Ah, the mask was actually just a well-known symbol from his homeworld, deformed almost beyond recognition from the ravages of time and getting stained with mud and blood.

“So is it V for Vendetta, or Vampire?” Doc quipped, “Kinda overlapping concepts here.”

The man with the Guy Fawkes mask did not reply, instead charging forward inhumanly fast with his hands. Doc noted that this guy didn’t have claws, or even long nails at all. A fascinating mutation of vampirism, Doc thought, as he easily sidestepped the direct attack.

“Let’s see those handsome fangs, Fang-Man,” Doc chirped, “Cause as your dentist, I think you need to get your wisdom teeth pulled. Or all of them.”

Dr. McNinja reached into his pocket and tossed the rice everywhere casually.

“Just thought I’d even things out. Or maybe it’s an odd number! Why don’t you start counting, Count Whackula?”

The man with the Guy Fawkes mask turned to glare at Doc. He lowered his head, looking at the rice Doc scattered.

Then he looked back up.

“Wow,” Doc gulped nervously, “That was fast counting.”

Fang-Man surged forward, sprinting over the rice Doc scattered. Doc parried the next blow with his sword, but wasn’t ready for the next. Despite his lack of nails, the Fang-Man clawed at Doc’s shoulder, ripping through Doc’s coat and creating some nasty gashes. Doc winced, then kicked at Fang-Man’s mask. Fang-Man grunted and flew back, landing hard against the back wall.

Doc gripped his shoulder with grit teeth. Okay, that was weird. This was a vampire, right? He was about as fast and strong as all the other vampires Doc fought. But this guy just skipped over the rice like it was nothing. Now, chances were, this was something else entirely.

Well, Doc would get some answers now. Fang-Man’s mask was cracked and crumbling. In frustration, Fang-Man tore it off and tossed it to the side.

He was an older gentleman than Doc, maybe about 40 years old. His blond hair was thinning, and his skin was starting to show some wrinkles, but otherwise, he was in good condition. Normal human pupils, pale but clearly still living skin, no claws.

“That was my favorite mask,” Fang-Man snarled.

“Get over it, Anony-Wuss.”

Fang-Man snarled again, showing off his teeth. Those were… definitely fangs in his mouth. They weren’t there a second ago.

What the hell was happening?

In his stunned confusion, Doc forgot to dodge, instead deciding to parry again. Fang-Man seemed to have expected this, because he gripped Doc’s sword by the blade and flung it to the other side of the room. Doc, alarmed by everything that happened, tried to jump to the side. Unfortunately, Fang-Man’s punch still connected against Doc’s rib cage, landing a grazing blow that still knocked the wind out of Doc’s lungs.

Dr. McNinja crumpled and rolled on the rough stone floor. He stood up, gripping his chest. Fang-Man lunged again. More ready this time, Doc rolled to the left. As he did, Doc gripped Fang-Man by the head and slammed his face into the floor. Fang-Man sword, swiping at Dr. McNinja, but too late; Doc was already catapulting himself backwards towards his sword to pick it up. Fang-Man stood up, his teeth normal again - oh no, never mind, the fangs were back.

“Okay, I’m pretty confused now,” Doc mumbled, “You a vampire, or nah?”

“Oh, Dr. McNinja,” Fang-Man said, licking his own teeth like a creep, “Why must one choose between the two?”

Doc froze. He glared at Fang-Man.

“I’m sorry,” McNinja said, “I’m afraid I’m at a disadvantage.”

“Oh, are we back on speaking terms?” Fang-Man quipped.

“Hey, you jumped me.”

Fang-Man rolled his eyes. “Details, details. Yes, I know you. I passed by your office not too long ago. I watched you work.”

Doc squinted, thoroughly creeped out. “Weirdo.”

“Am I? Am I to believe you’ve never scouted out potential enemies?” Fang-Man said, nonplussed, “I was in the neighborhood, and I wanted to see who the famous Dr. McNinja was. He who could cure the most esoteric and arcane of diseases… perhaps, even vampirism.”

“If you wanted to be cured, you could’ve just asked,” Doc chuckled, “I would have loved to decline you.”

“I wanted to see if you were worthy of capture,” Fang-Man sighed. “Alas, you are but a normal doctor. Nothing for me to drain.”

“Hey, I resent that!” Doc snapped, pushing his rib back in place. That should hold for the rest of the fight. “I’m not just any doctor. I’m Doctor McNin-”

“Yes, yes,” Fang-Man sighed again, “Regardless, I believed you were at least clever enough to figure out my plan. I’d say I led you here, but truth be told, you found yourself here before I could even hatch a plan.”

Fang-Man smirked. “Did the Pellbrooks finally manage to break your vow of pacifism? Was Hippocrates not born in your world?”

“Oh, I’m no pacifist,” Dr. McNinja said, stretching his arms properly this time. “I was just retired.”

“You should have stayed that way.”

“Probably,” Doc sighed, “Too late now, though. Gotta stop you.”

“Well, be my guest,” Fang-Man laughed, “But I think it unfair that only you bear a weapon.”

Dr. McNinja rolled his eyes. “I’m not putting away the sword, Fang-Man.”

“Oh of course! I see you’re quite attached. But there’s no need,” Fang-Man smirked, “Just allow me to retrieve my own weapon.”

Before Doc could reply, Fang-Man’s eyes started glowing. In fact, they were fully illuminating the room with yellow-white light, which seemed to pulse like a heartbeat. With each “beat,” the room was filled with a warm breeze that grew hotter over time. Doc squinted through the sudden brightness, thoroughly alarmed.

Fang-Man grabbed something Doc couldn’t see out of the air, then made a tugging motion. Dr. McNinja squinted to see what it was, but before he could fully process what was happening while doing the equivalent of staring into the sun, he felt something enter his stomach.

Doc looked down. The glow had dimmed a bit, allowing him to see what he confirmed with the sudden feeling of warmth in his stomach. A sword made of incandescent light, which seemed to spill off the edges like wax on a glass edge, was pierce through his abdomen.

Dr. McNinja looked up in disbelief. The one wielding the blade was none other than Fang-Man, who flashed his vampiric fangs in delight.

“And my name isn’t Fang-Man,” he whispered into Doc’s ear, “It’s Walden Arbridge.”

With a grunt, Walden yanked the golden edge out of Doc’s stomach. Dr. McNinja immediately collapsed, coughing blood and feeling his entrails start to shiver at the feeling of the cold air.

Dr. McNinja was going to die. There was no way around it. He had already suffered injuries that would put down a normal man, and this was an inarguably fatal blow. He remembered how, years ago, in his homeworld, Doc had argued Death himself about how a spray of bullets wasn’t enough to kill him. But this was nothing like that. Even if Doc didn’t go immediately into shock, there was very little a surgeon could do right now. And Walden was, you know, right there.

Doc looked down, his wound shimmering with light. His vision started dimming as he felt his breath leave him. Walden Arbridge rolled his eyes.

“Oh, relax,” Walden said, “This weapon can’t actually kill you, unless you’re a fiend or undead. Which I assume you’re not. Just wanted a chance to chat.”

Dr. McNinja wanted to laugh, but he couldn’t. And after all, Walden was right. Doc’s stomach, which was ripped to shreds, was starting to pulse as golden light started stitching them back together.

“You may be wondering why a vampire is able to use holy magic like this,” Walden smirked, turning his back to pace in his chamber.

Oh yes, good point. Dr. McNinja was so focused on being that close to death that he hadn’t even put that together.

“Well, you see, my good doctor, I am a child of a blessed bloodline,” Walden continued, “Like the Campbells, the Gordons- and the Pellbrooks, whom you’ve met. We are blessed with a natural affinity for various forms of magic.”

Walden knelt down next to Doc, who was still healing. The bandit’s golden energy was still creeping along Doc’s torso.

“The Arbridges are able to siphon the talents of corpses,” Walden said, “After a ritual, I channel all the powers that a dead body had when they lived. I gain their skills, the ones I find useful, and I am not burdened with the rest. I have to keep their remains, of course. For example…”

Walden lifted the cloth on the middle altar, revealing a large box. “Here, you’ll find Peter Pellbrook Sr.’s bones. He was a paladin, if you’ll recall.”

Doc tried to glare, but his face felt so weak. Apparently not noticing Doc’s struggle, Walden tightened his hand into a fist, and gripped the fist with his other hand, biting hard into his lip. The man stood up and gazed at something far away.

“I’d like to say this sorcerous gift is an honor, but it truly isn’t. My father was… a difficult man. Perhaps poor parenting skills come with the magic.”

Doc gasped as he felt his breath return to him. He moved his arm with some difficulty, feeling his stomach. The devastating stab was now more of a gash than anything. He watched as Walden strolled to his bedside table, picking up a photo with equal parts fondness and disgust.

“As you may know, the Pellbrook women are the strongest of their bloodline. So it was with the Arbridge men. I was the only male child of my generation, so the pressure was on me to carry the bloodline. I…”

Walden paused. “I was never enough.”

“So… So you…” Doc said, silently gasping for breath, “So this is… revenge? Against the Pellbrooks?”

Walden shrugged. “What? No. I don’t care about the Pellbrooks. Or my father. Well, I’m certain I have deep-seated issues with her that I have yet to resolve, but she is dead now, and no longer matters. No, I don’t want revenge. I just want to reach my potential… as myself. In my own way. Explore the extent of my abilities without meeting someone’s expectations.”

Dr. McNinja snarled. “You’ve killed.”

“As have you. In the name of the greater good, no doubt.” Walden shrugged. “But blood is on your hands, just like mine.”

“Just like you?” Doc stifled a laugh. “What a classic

“Why can’t you see this for what it is? I’m not a villain. I’m just a broken child, who misses his father, searching for self-actualization.”

Dr. McNinja gave him a stupefied glare. “You’re psychotic.”

“And you’re a terrible psychiatrist. I don’t feel better at all,” Walden sighed. “You know, one of my underlings recommended I get some therapy. And while I was cleaning up his blood, I realized he may have a point. I feel pretty terrible about all this.”

Doc couldn’t even find an appropriate response to that, so it was a good thing that he decided that was the moment to throw up. He lifted his mask slightly to make way for the barf as he ejected the contents of his stomach onto the floor. Walden hissed through his teeth.

“Yeah, sorry, the holy magic can do that sometimes.”

“You think,” Doc coughed, “You think this is therapy?”

“Well, yes,” Walden said, “I saw from your sign that you do walk-ins, so to speak.”

“This isn’t therapy,” Dr. McNinja gagged, “You want someone to forgive you. You want someone to tell you that what you’re doing is okay.”

Walden clapped excitedly, sitting on his bed. He grinned eagerly, listening.

“Yes, this is the kind of thing I’m talking about!” Walden chirped, “Analyse me, Doctor. Fix me, so I may return to my tasks.”

Doc managed to push himself into a more comfortable sitting position. His gaze met Peter’s. The teenager was staring back remorsefully, tears in his eyes.

Dr. McNinja inhaled deeply. “Explain what you’re doing with Peter Pellbrook.”

Walden rolled his eyes. “Sure, okay. This may actually give you some helpful insight.”

The older man stood up and strolled over to Peter’s prison. He leaned on the coffin a bit, smiling arrogantly.

“You see, since I was young, I’ve had a bit of a fascination with vampires. My abilities only work on the dead, but I wanted to see how they’d interact with the undead.

“My first experiments were a failure. As you know, vampires turn into fog or dust when they are killed, and try as I might, my rituals couldn’t interact with the dust. I’ve actually gone through a few vampires testing it out, so, you’re welcome.”

Doc looked at him, unamused. Walden continued nonetheless.

“But then I realized that a vampire is, biologically speaking, already dead. Perhaps my powers could interact with a living vampire! Erm, so to speak. So I tested the process on some other vampires. Many were… reluctant to be held here forever, and even fewer of them could be captured alive.”

Walden chuckled. “But a human is nowhere near as powerful as a vampire. So if I turned a trapped human - with enough precautionary traps - the newborn vampire would be completely unable to escape.”

Peter snarled as Walden caressed his face.

“Along came Peter Pellbrook Junior. Big dreams of making money for his family so he could buy the newest computer to modernize his household. What a noble dream, no? Well, I offered him a small job. He snuck out of his house, I trapped him here, and…”

Walden opened a cupboard, showing dozens of vials. They contained a substance Doc knew all too well.

“I have plenty of vampiric essence left over from my research,” Walden said. “Well, the process worked. As you’ve observed, I get all the benefits of a vampire, but I don’t suffer from the esoteric weaknesses. Covered my tracks by attacking the Pellbrooks disguised as their son, and even got the skeleton of their dead, powerful paladin father in the hubbub.”

Dr. McNinja grunted as he sat up again. His legs had some feeling again. Well, they were asleep, but they were starting to wake up. A flash of memories flooded his brain.

“Vampires are burnt by running water…”

“There’s a small orange stream coming out of it! You can’t miss it!”

“I wonder how he got inside without being invited…”

“Why isn’t he drinking their blood?” Doc said to himself out loud.

Oh God. No wonder. This meant that the rice wasn’t going to protect Oswin at all. Walden could stroll in whenever he wanted. Oswin was in danger.

Well, okay, so was Doc. Quite imminent danger, actually. Verge of death.

Dr. McNinja was struggling to stay awake, but he actually was losing quite a bit of blood. Hopefully the adrenaline would carry Doc through the rest of this fight. Adrenaline, and spite.

Doc winced as he tried to stand up. He sat down again. Not yet. “What’s the deal with Blythe? Why are you turning her? You could have just killed her.”

“That’s not as interesting a question. But fine. I’d like to discuss my relationship with my father more after this,” Walden said with a thoughtful sigh. “Peter is talented, but the real Pellbrook power comes from their women. My parents and his grandparents were close. And while Ariel Pellbrook scares me, I knew she wouldn’t be able to stop a vampirification by herself. Never expected her to call you. I thought she’d come crawling to the source, so I could turn her.”

“You’re too much of a coward to actually become a vampire,” Doc groaned, “But you’ll put someone else through it. Someone innocent.”

Walden chuckled. “The girl I’m sweet on is a morning person. She seemed impressed with my superhuman endurance, if you catch my meaning.”

“And what happens to Peter,” Doc groaned, “when you have Blythe?’

Walden shrugged. “No point in keeping two vampires around, is there? Especially since the boy’s been real uppity lately. I’ll probably just stake him and be done with it.”

Dr. McNinja coughed again, spitting out the last of the bile in his mouth. He finally stood up, his sword making a metallic noise as the blade scraped against the cave floor.

“Yeah,” he finally said, “I’m gonna kill you now.”

Walden’s expression didn’t change, but his face grew darker all the same. Peter snarled again, sensing the tension, and struggled against his chains. Walden’s hands warbled with magical energy as he allowed himself another smirk.

“Give it your best try.”

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Dr. McNinja · Oct 20, 2021

Neither doctor nor sorcerer moved a muscle for a few seconds. Somewhere, in another part of the cave, blood dripped into a puddle of water with a mournful PLINK.

In a flash of movement, Doc hurled his grappling hook. Walden lifted his holy sword over his chest to deflect it. Unfortunately for him, Doc was aiming for his feet. The cable wrapped around Walden’s ankles tautly, causing him to look down. Before he could break the cable, however, Doc pulled hard.

As strong as Walden was, his balance was apparently still not great. He fell hard on his back, cursing as the holy sword dissipated. Doc spun in the air with an agility even he didn’t know he had, swinging down for Walden. The blade cut straight through Walden, but Doc felt no resistance. Walden cackled, his body slowly turning into a cloud. Doc tumbled back as the mist faded and dissipated. He started circling the room, swiping at the air to find any inconsistent densities in the air. On the way, out of spite, Doc started cutting up some of Walden’s furniture.

Doc looked around at the room before chopping something with glee. Now there was one thing that would really upset Walden if he damaged it.

He was interrupted by the noise of a boot grinding against dust behind him. Doc whirled around, just in time to catch Walden’s radiant blade with his own. Unfortunately, in his brief moment of triumph, Doc didn’t notice that Walden’s right hand was clumped in a fist and headed for Doc’s head.

Doc disengaged his blade, ducking and weaving between both the sword and the punch. He jumped into the air to kick Walden, but the sorcerer caught Doc’s shin out of the air with ease. With no sign of effort, Walden tossed Doc aside.

Dr. McNinja grunted, back on the floor and fully prone. Okay, either the healing wasn’t finished, or his organs decided to start internally bleeding again. Either way, not a great time.

Walden chuckled as some of Doc’s internal bleeding started becoming external. Doc had opened a cut somewhere without knowing. Oops.

“I’m disappointed,” Walden chided, “I knew you were basically a regular man, but with all those weapons on your walls, I thought you’d be at least a decent warrior. I can’t believe I almost left Peter Sr.’s bones in your woods to take you instead.”

Doc groaned again, then looked up.

“Wait, you took his bones through the woods by my office?”

Walden sighed. “Yes, well, I wanted to visit you, but I’m usually quite busy. I thought I’d drop by while I was on my way back to the-“

“No, no, seriously,” Doc said with a smirk, “You took Peter Pellbrook Sr.’s bones through THOSE woods?”

Walden frowned. “So?”

Dr. McNinja laughed breathlessly, resting his head back on the ground. “God, you’re an idiot.”

“What?”

Doc continued to laugh. Walden snarled, the holy energy dissipating from his arms and being replaced with the aura of the undead.

“WHAT’S SO FUNNY?!” Walden bellowed.

“The woods outside of my office,” Doc said with a smile, “are SUPER haunted.”

“AND?!”

“And you took a holy paladin’s bones through them,” Doc chuckled, “You have no idea what you just unleashed on yourself.”

Walden looked a little concerned for a second. He looked at the box in his altar. “Does… Does this mean those bones are haunted now?”

“Probably not,” Doc replied tersely.

Walden scoffed. “Then what was the point of all that?”

“To freak you out,” Doc said, “And to buy some time for Peter to stop counting the rice I scattered earlier. Whenever you’re ready, Pete!”

Walden frowned, before spinning around. Peter Pellbrook Jr., freed from his bonds by Doc’s random slashing minutes before, hissed angrily from behind Walden. With a hungry grin, Peter lunged at the older man. Walden jumped out of the way, but not before Peter took his sharp claws and raked across Walden’s chest. The older man fell hard face-first onto the floor, groaning. Peter glared triumphantly at Walden, licking the blood off his talons.

“Eighty-three,” Peter snarled with glee.

Peter rushed over to Doc, offering his hand. Dr. McNinja hesitated slightly, but took it. Peter winced as Doc almost doubled over in pain. With a shimmer, Peter’s hands coated itself in water before Peter waved them over Doc’s stomach.

“That should help with the pain for now,” Peter said.

“Good to finally meet you in person, Peter,” Doc said, “Heard a lot about you from your family.”

“Sorry about them,” Peter said, “Are you okay?”

“I think my liver just quit on me, so no,” Doc said, lifting his sword again, “How about you?”

“I was killed and then tortured with liquid fire for the last week,” Peter said with a grin, “So I’m not so great either.”

Doc couldn’t help but laugh at the comment. Peter smiled back, clearly exhausted but affable all the same.

“I apologize for interrupting this little meeting,” Walden said, “But I’m still here.”

Doc squinted his eyes as he watched Walden wave his hands over his chest. He watched Peter’s healing magic manifesting through Walden’s hands, healing his cuts. Doc grimaced as he brandished his blade. Peter crouched slightly as he readied to lunge at Walden.

“Welp, I don’t have another round in me,” Doc muttered.

“Go for his shoulderblades,” Peter mumbled back, “My powers are channeled through tattoos on his left shoulder, and my dad’s on his right. If you damage them, they might shut down.”

“Noted,” Doc replied, “You go left.”

Peter disintegrated almost instantly into mist. Walden was searching for traces of the boy, but Doc tumbled to the right while throwing more frozen shamrocks. They embedded themselves in Walden’s knee, causing him to buckle down in pain. Clearly, Walden wasn’t used to the feeling. Doc would fix that.

The assassin recovered from his tumble straight into an airborne somersault, sticking his blade out to slash at Walden. With little effort, Walden caught the blade again, and prepared to throw Doc again. But Doc was ready, and released the handle in time before Walden flung his sword away. Walden, unimpressed, caught Doc out the air by his neck.

Before Walden could do any actual damage, Peter rematerialized behind him. With an eager grin, Peter dove his claws as hard as he could into the back of Walden’s left shoulder.

Walden, however, seemed to expect the counterattack. He started glowing again, and Peter hissed as he stumbled backwards from Walden’ shoulder. The sorcerer chuckled as he looked at Peter’s increasingly fetal position.

“It’s very rude to interrupt adults when they’re talking, boy,” Walden spat, his eyes spilling over with holy energy. He turned back to Dr. McNinja, who was still getting choked out by Walden’s hand. Doc was keenly aware of the fact that Walden could snap his neck like a twig right now. “Now, where were we?”

Unexpectedly, Dr. McNinja grinned back at Walden. The sorcerer rolled his eyes.

“What now?”

“Pell- gack Pellbrook. Be- Behind you.”

Walden snickered. “You think I’d fall for something like that?”

Doc snickered back, wiping Walden’s smirk off his face.

“Pity,” Doc gagged, “It’s true.”

With little ceremony, a watery spear pierced Walden’s right shoulder. The 40-year-old man looked down at the wound with fascination, before the spear started bubbling. Walden yelped and tried to pull it out, but instead, the spear turned into a harpoon and started dragging Walden by the shoulder towards the room’s entrance.

Standing there, hands all shimmering with magic, were Aldrich, Garrick and Oswin Pellbrook.

Aldrich waved his hands again, and the harpoon lifted Walden into the air. It was fully boiling now, steam emerging from Walden’s wound as he hissed. With a desperate expression, Walden twisted his torso and vanished once more into mist. The mist flew out the door with a gasp.

Dr. McNinja stared at the boys, absolutely flabbergasted. He stood up, limping towards Aldrich and staring at him. Eventually, he turned to Garrick. Garrick was giving him a shit-eating grin, so Doc poked him in the nose.

“Ey!”

“No, because,” Doc gasped, “You were definitely dead. You were very dead.”

Doc turned to Oswin. “They were dead.”

“We got better,” Aldrich said.

Peter shuffled uncomfortably in place. Aldrich glared at his younger brother, as did Garrick.

“Hello, Peter,” Oswin said.

“Hi, Oswin,” Peter said, sheepishly. It was almost hilarious for Doc to watch a vampire be this shy.

Garrick waved his hand. Peter waved back, then looked expectantly at Aldrich. Aldrich glared back, anger locking his jaw. Doc watched them with concern.

“So,” Aldrich said through grit teeth.

Peter nodded. “So.”

“You’re a vampire now.”

Peter shrugged. “Didn’t want to be. I was kidnapped.”

“We know,” Garrick said, “We heard from the bandit who was trying to run away.”

Peter nodded. Aldrich glared at him furiously.

“Mama sent us to put you down,” Aldrich said.

Peter blinked at that, then looked away. “Do what you have to.”

Garrick and Oswin looked up at Aldrich, who was clearly deliberating something, though his face didn’t give anything away. Doc had to remind himself the kid was still 19, because his expression was that of a military leader. But finally, Aldrich flickered his eyes towards Doc, and his expression softened.

Aldrich released his arms, and rushed towards Peter. Peter flinched, but shut his eyes and expected the worst.

Which, Doc assumed, probably wasn’t a hug.

Aldrich gripped him tightly.

“I hate to say it,” Aldrich said with a shaky voice, “But I told you not to wander off.”

Peter choked on his tears as he realized what was happening. But he couldn’t resist for long. Full-on sobbing, Peter hugged Aldrich back like his life depended on it.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Peter sobbed, “I’m so sorry…”

“I know. It’s not your fault,” Aldrich muttered, “It’s not your fault.”

Garrick grit his teeth, apparently trying to will his tears away. As he failed to do so, Garrick marched towards his brothers and hugged them tightly as well.

“You’re such a fucking dumbass,” Garrick said through his tears, causing Peter to laugh.

Oswin shuffled uncomfortably, a smile still on his face. Doc nodded at him encouragingly. After another brief moment, Oswin shook his head and smiled.

“No, I’m okay,” he mumbled.

Garrick suddenly drew his head out of the hug, nose very snotty. “Oswin, shut the fuck up and get in here.”

Oswin flinched, his smile starting to waver. Doc gently pushed him, and that seemed to be all Oswin needed. The boy started walking, almost afraid, but eventually fully sprinted into the hug, sobbing louder than everyone else. He tried to blubber something, which Doc couldn’t even begin to understand or translate.

The four brothers sobbed and swayed back-and-forth in a tight hug. Doc smiled. This was worth fighting that Walden son of a bitch.

Walden.

“Sorry to interrupt, boys,” Doc groaned, “But Walden isn’t a real vampire.”

Aldrich looked at him in confusion. Peter wiped his tears away, his face suddenly rigid with determination.

“He’s siphoning my vampire powers,” Peter sniffled, “but he doesn’t have any of the vampire’s weaknesses.”

“That’s why the rice didn’t work,” Garrick mused, “I thought Doc was just stupid.”

Doc willed himself to ignore that comment. “That means he can enter the daylight. We can’t let him get away. He’s the worst.”

Aldrich grinned, wiping his own tears away.

“Did you really think we did all that and let the bastard get away?” Aldrich chuckled, “We have back-up. A paladin.”

Doc squinted. “You found a paladin out here?”

“He found us,” Oswin said with a chuckle.

“Well, I hope he’s good,” Peter groaned, “Walden’s a tough one.”

“Oh, don’t worry, Pete,” Garrick said, slapping him on the back, “He’s the best.”

Peter winced as Doc jogged out the door. “Actually, Garrick, I’m in intense pain and incredibly malnourished, so if you could ease back on the hitting…”

“Come on, Pete,” Aldrich said, “You’re gonna like this.”

Peter stumbled forward to leave the room for the first time in what felt like forever. Garrick, who apparently felt sorry about the earlier slap, offered his vampire brother his shoulder. Peter smiled as warmly as a monster of the night could, wrapping his arm around Garrick to support himself as he limped. He found Dr. McNinja outside, his mouth agape, stammering in confusion.

And Peter couldn’t help but do the same.

“Dad?” Peter said, in a voice quieter than a whisper.

Standing with one foot on top of Walden, an ethereally transparent figure outlined with golden fire looked up at the Pellbrook boys. He was wearing what must’ve been elaborate blindingly white plate armor, ornately decorated with golden antlers and other symbols. Despite the aggressive pose, his face was completely serene as he gave his sons a warm smile.

“There you are, my sons,” the ghost of Peter Sr. said, “Good to see you boys getting along again.”

2172 words

29093 / 10000 words

Dr. McNinja · Oct 21, 2021

Peter turned to Dr. McNinja, confused.

“But you-“ Peter stammered, “Earlier, when you- I thought you were-“

“Oh, yeah, I was bluffing,” Doc mumbled, eyes plastered on the ghost ahead of him, “I had no idea this could happen.”

“You must be Dr. McNinja,” Peter Sr. chortled, “I understand you were escorting my boys to hunt little Peter down.”

Doc gulped. “Yes, sir. I was- Well, I-“

Doc blinked rapidly. He had no idea why he was calling this man “sir”, but it just slipped out. Now, how to explain to the paladin ghost that he wasn’t really trying to kill Peter?

Peter Sr. seemed to sense his apprehension, and chuckled. “I also hear you convinced them to spare Peter. Well, Aldrich, at least, but given how stubborn they are, I’m surprised you made any headway at all.”

The boys in question all groaned in embarrassment. Doc, on his part, was still far too stunned.

“So, I’m confused,” McNinja finally managed to say, “How are you here? Were you actually haunted by the woods outside my office? Are you gonna make faces at me through the window now?”

“I was called,” Peter Sr. said, “A prayer reached me through the afterlife, and my soul was summoned to protect my family.”

Doc squinted for a second. “More magic bullshit. Got it.”

The ghost raised a disapproving eyebrow, but his amused smile kept Doc at ease. Without a beat, the ghost kicked the unconscious body of Walden.

“I awoke near Oswin, who was grieving the death of his two brothers,” he said with a darkened expression, “Fortunately, the Light Above All granted me some of my restorative magic from my living days. It was nothing short of a blessing that I arrived when I did.”

“So even more magic bullshit,” Doc said.

“Would you rather we still be dead?” Aldrich said with a smirk.

Dr. McNinja opened his mouth to say something snarky, but smiled instead.

“No,” Doc finally said, “No, seeing that… sucked.”

“And how’d you catch him?” Peter Jr. said, pointing at Walden.

“I was a paladin captain,” his father chuckled, “You think I got that far without learning to disrupt a vampire’s mist form?”

“Not a real vampire, but whatever,” Doc muttered. Peter Sr. lifted Walden up by the collar of his shirt, gazing at him unhappily.

“Now, Walden, I always thought you were an odd one, but my family and I treated you with respect. And now you’ve killed not one, not two, but three of my sons,” the ghost said, his voice booming with supernatural intent, “And I see now your intentions are wicked. So, in the name of the Light Above All, I must purge you from this realm.

“I condemn you, Walden Arbridge,” the ghost continued.

Peter Sr. grunted, and Walden’s body glowed with ethereal light. Aldrich turned to Doc.

“Wait,” Aldrich said, “if he’s not a real vampire…”

“He’s a normal man,” Doc said, “So the holy magic would actually-“

Walden abruptly opened his eyes, his wounds seemingly healed. He smiled savagely at the ghost. “Would it help if I apologized?”

The ghost frowned. “I do not understand-“

Walden seemed to gather saliva in his mouth as Doc and the Pellbrook boys all prepared to stop him. However, they were too late. Walden spat a green fluid into Peter Sr.’s face.

Despite being a ghost, Peter Sr. seemed to recoil at the attack. As the paladin’s spirit grumbled at the dirty trick, Doc could’ve sworn that the ethereal form was beginning to quiver. Eventually, the quivering suddenly stopped. As did Peter Sr.

Doc squinted, confused. Peter Sr. seemed to be paralyzed, as he was standing in place. His eyes moved side to side, trying to comprehend the situation. McNinja didn’t even know that could happen to ghosts. But then, he never got the chance to investigate many ghosts, did he?

More importantly, what was that thing Walden did? Was it another victim he was siphoning powers from?

Doc would answer these questions later. For now, he had to locate whatever tattoo that was. Thankfully, he had back-up from three fledgeling mages and a vampire. Not the kind of aid he would have expected at any given point of his life, but he would take it-

Wait, were they coming?

Doc turned around to see the other Pellbrook boys. They were all frozen in place as well, in various states of preparing to harm Walden. Like, Peter Sr., their eyes were moving in panic.

Dr. McNinja was just distracted enough for Walden to prick him in the back of the neck with something. Wait, Doc thought as his body slowed to a halt, I recognize this.

“Hm, alright, that was annoying,” Walden snarled, gripping his sides. He approached Aldrich, and squeezed his cheeks. “You’re all much more resourceful than I expected. Serves me right for underestimating the mighty Pellbrooks. Still, didn’t expect the ORIGINAL Peter to show up.”

Walden stretched, then showed Doc his left forearm. A surprisingly beautiful and ornate tattoo was crawling up it, looking like abstract forms of a blue pixie with a crown.

“Fortunately, I still have some tricks up my sleeve.”

Doc couldn’t move his body at all - his body was incredibly numb and just not listening to commands. Fortunately, the rest of his head seemed to still be working. He glared at Walden.

“So you’re the one who kidnapped the pixie king,” Doc said.

“You can still talk?” Walden said, impressed, “Yes, I did. King Orilay, I believe is his name? Quite the powerful little thing. Dead now, of course. And his body lets me paralyze entire bloodlines.”

Walden chuckled. “Until I release the spell, Peter Sr. and all his little children will be frozen, unable to move, feel, or even die. Oh, you’re under the same spell, of course.”

The sorcerer sighed, patting Doc’s shoulder. That was weird. Clearly this magical poison was some kind of anesthetic, because no matter what Walden did, Doc couldn’t feel it on his body.

“Hopefully, you don’t have any blood relatives here, Doctor,” Walden sighed, “Or they’ll be suffering the same fate. Living statues. Spooky, isn’t it?”

Walden leaned against the wall of the tunnel, watching with amusement at the six men all glaring at him. As he grinned, mushrooms started rapidly growing out of the craggy floor, stretching and sprawling in a perfect circle.

“And, as I learned recently,” the sorcerer said breathlessly, “The fae can make portals! Thank goodness, I don’t have to trudge all the way to your house. Perhaps you can say goodbye to Blythe. Before, you know, I turn her into my vampire captive.”

Walden started warbling, his eyes glowing green. Doc watched with horror as the mushrooms began to glow green as well, the caps of the fungi warbling and vibrating with the same frequency. They seemed to release glowing spores that lit up like fireflies. The spores began to coalesce in the center of the circle as Walden stepped out of the way.

Then, the coalescence seemed to eat itself alive in a horrific vision of ferality. As the spores burned through each other, the void left behind pulsed disgustingly. There was an opening in the air now, a hole in space itself. Dr. McNinja found it difficult to even properly perceive what looking through the portal was like. But there it was, a hole, bound by floating embers and burning spores.

Walden reached through the hole. Doc could hear shuffling sounds from the other side, the sound distorted and muffled. Then, a second later, Walden drew Blythe’s body from the portal.

Dr. McNinja’s head was starting to stiffen as well, his eyes starting to glaze over from dehydration. God, he couldn’t even blink. All he could do was stare at Blythe’s face. Her skin was as pale as a corpse, but her eyes stared straight forward. Of course. She must have been afflicted with the same curse.

“Ah, why didn’t I think to do this earlier?” Walden sighed, “If I had stung Peter with this curse, then none of you would be able to bother me. Everyone who shares blood with Peter Jr. would just be frozen at home. Ah, well. Better now than never.”

Doc stared at the portal in horror. It was still gaping open, threatening to suck in air around it like a drain. His jaw was still loose. Okay, okay. One sentence to stop Walden.

…what the hell was he supposed to say?

Okay, think. Who’s still around to find them here? The other bandits? Unlikely. The pixies? Oswin killed them all, and apparently they were loath to come here. Makes sense, they wouldn’t venture far from their own fae circles. Hm… it would take some time, but Ariel would eventually sense something was wrong and make her way here. But she was no match by herself, especially if Walden were to access stronger fae magic to charm Doc and the Pellbrooks.

…wait a second!

“Peeehhh,” Doc managed to say with great difficulty. His jaw just wouldn’t cooperate. He had seconds left.

Walden turned to look at him. Blythe’s frozen body was slung over his shoulder, and he was about to enter his chambers again.

“Yes?” Walden said affably.

“Pell… buh… bruuhhh… brook,” Doc struggled, “B’ind you.”

Walden clicked his tongue. “Okay, really, Doctor? That’s pitiful. You are out of Pellbrooks. They’re all paralyzed.”

Doc grinned as the portal warbled again. His hunch was right. Walden seemed to notice as well. He dropped Blythe like a sack of potatoes next to the door to his chamber, watching the portal in terror.

“Shhhhame,” Doc managed to say, “‘S trrrruuuee.”

And with that, Dr. McNinja let the curse take over his body. Thankfully, the way he was positioned, he had a good view of Ariel Pellbrook’s hand bursting out of the portal. Walden, panicked, started waving his hands to disperse the spores that made up the portal.

Before he could close the portal, Ariel’s hand made a fist. Walden flew back as a man-sized tidal wave exploded out of Ariel’s knuckles, crushing him against the opposite wall of the cave. With the impact, Doc suddenly felt his body start moving again. He rubbed his jaw to loosen the muscles as he turned to see the Pellbrook boys start stretching again. They gave Doc an excited smile as they realized what was happening.

Ariel, meanwhile, had fully stepped through the portal in all her absolutely furious glory.

“Hello, Walden,” Ariel said, her voice dripping with malice, “Been a while.”

“Impossible,” Walden said. The wave from earlier was continuing to push against him, holding him against the wall. “You’re… You’re a Pellbrook! Your entire family… should be paralyzed!”

“Actually, you stung Peter Sr., Walden,” Doc explained, “And Ariel isn’t blood-related to him, ‘cause the Pellbrooks don’t believe in incest.”

Ariel twirled her finger, and the wave suddenly turned into a jagged ice structure, forming their own stalactites that emanated from Walden’s body. Walden gasped as his prison suddenly grew very cold.

“Please, Ariel,” Walden coughed, “We used to play together. You don’t need to-“

An icicle snapped off of the structure, and shot straight through Walden’s cheek. Doc winced as he noticed that the icicle had eviscerated Walden’s tongue. Walden screamed as Ariel rolled her eyes.

“Shut the hell up, Walden,” the matriarch snapped.

Garrick cheered, “Get his ass, Mama!”

“Actually, can you get his left arm?” Doc told Ariel, “Just scratch up that tattoo-“

Ariel nodded, and the ice around Walden’s left arm started to quiver again. Then, quite abruptly, the ice split off from the rest of the structure, ripping Walden’s arm clean off. Walden screamed again, and Doc winced.

Peter’s ghost approached Ariel.

“Honeybean,” the ghost said, “Please. Not in front of the children.”

Ariel turned in surprise, her body language suddenly… very soft. The matriarch seemed like a completely different person now. She lifted one shaking hand to touch Peter’s cheek. The points where her fingers made contact made golden ripples throughout the ghost’s cheek.

“Peter?” Ariel said breathlessly.

“Sorry I’m late,” Peter said with a sad chuckle, “Traffic was hell.”

Doc rushed over to Walden, who was gasping for air and gripping his shoulder-stump. Despite how horrible Walden was, Doc couldn’t help but feel pity and guilt. Garrick, meanwhile, had formed a watery knife and scratched a big line in Walden’s disembodied arm. Doc looked at him disapprovingly, and Garrick nodded.

“I know, I know,” Garrick responded, “But it doesn’t hurt to make sure. Pretty sick of his tricks.”

Peter, who apparently didn’t care for respecting the defeated, picked up Walden by the collar of his shirt. Walden grunted, nearly delirious from the pain.

“You tortured me,” Peter snarled, “Turned me into a monster. And then you tried to kill my family, and do the same to my sister. But you know what the worst thing you did is?”

Peter grinned, almost evilly. “You forgot to feed me today.”

Peter hissed, his fangs now fully protruded. The other Pellbrook boys watched in horror as Peter started drinking from Walden’s neck. Peter’s eyes rolled back in what Doc knew must be immaculate pleasure. Ariel noticed this, and her eyes widened in fury.

“You disgusting monster,” Ariel snarled, “You rob my son’s body and you think you CAN-“

Aldrich rushed in front of Peter, followed shortly by Garrick and Oswin. “Mama, no!”

Peter, who was just experiencing the greatest high known to the undead, suddenly dropped Walden, as if he only just realized what he had done. He looked at his mother’s face, contorted with rage and murderous intent.

“Move!” Ariel snarled.

Aldrich swallowed hard, then stared Ariel down with determination.

“No.”

Ariel nearly popped a vessel at the sight of her three sons daring to defy her. Then, her husband’s ghost laid a single hand on her shoulder, and her expression softened again (though, not nearly enough for Doc to be comfortable). Peter Sr.’s ghost gave her a soft smile.

“It’s not his fault, Honeybean,” the paladin whispered, “He’s sick, and needs our help. Don’t hate him.”

Ariel turned back, her brow wrinkled in thought. Then, her eyes widened as she seemed to notice something. Doc turned around.

Peter had vanished.

Peter Sr. used a single finger to move Ariel’s chin, turning her gaze back to him. Ariel looked back, absolutely stunned.

“It’s so good to see you again,” the ghost said, his tenderness filling the whole tunnel with warmth.

“How is this possible?” Ariel said, “You… You…”

“The Light Above All sent me to set things right,” Peter replied with a bitter smile, “But I’ve done what I came to do. I… do not have much time.”

Ariel bit her lip hard. Doc couldn’t help but be reminded of a schoolgirl being comforted.

“Why did you have to…” Ariel said, holding back her sobs, “It’s been so… You don’t even… I was all. Alone. I just… I just-“

“I know,” Peter said, moving Ariel’s hair out of her eyes, “Things have been hard, haven’t they, my dear?”

Ariel squeezed her eyes shut, sobbing silently. Peter pulled her into a tight embrace, wrapping his arms around Ariel’s shoulders. Ariel’s hands were gripping tightly onto Peter’s breastplate, as if afraid to let go.

“I’m so sorry, Ariel,” Peter sighed.

Ariel started sobbing in earnest at those words. The other Pellbrook boys all joined the hug. Peter was quietly saying something to his family. Doc slipped away into Walden’s room, dragging Walden with him. This seemed personal.

Walden gasped for breath, his face pale. Hm. It seemed that Peter had injected Walden with a lot of vampiric essence. Walden’s incisors were changing so fast Doc could see them grow. His skin was as pale as paper, and the

“Doctor,” Walden mumbled, his tongue a mangled mess, “Please.”

Dr. McNinja looked at him. He focused on all the things that Walden had done, the absolutely reprehensible actions he had taken with no remorse. Was it right for Doc to kill him now? Was this an execution, and did Doc have the right? He had taken an oath to never harm. And while he didn’t take the oath very seriously, Doc knew he had to draw a line somewhere.

He put his hands into his pockets, and felt the bottle of holy water inside. Doc thought about Peter.

“You want me to help you?”

Walden nodded desperately.

“Then let me prescribe you some medicine,” Doc said, kneeling next to Walden’s face. He drew the bottle of holy water from his pocket and showed it to Walden. Walden’s eyes widened in fear. “Drink some of this, and call me in the morning.”

Walden shook his head fervently as Doc forced the bottle into his mouth. He could tell when the holy water started flowing, as Walden started struggling and wriggling. Fortunately for Doc’s conscience, Walden didn’t suffer much. His eyes rolled back, and his body rapidly deteriorated into dust.

Dr. McNinja stood up, pocketing the rest of the holy water. He glanced at the cabinet full of vampire essence. Hm. He’d have to take this home, if only just to secure it.

“Dr. McNinja,” a booming voice said behind him.

Doc turned, and looked at Peter Sr.’s smiling face. The paladin’s ghost approached him. Doc smiled and met him in the middle.

“I guess that was your unfinished purpose?” Doc said, “You gonna head back soon? I overheard you don’t have much time left.”

“Yes,” Peter said with a sigh, “Time for me to return to the Light. More… magic bullshit, as you would say.”

Doc chuckled.

“As I said earlier, my boys spoke fondly of you,” Peter said, “They said you helped them realize some things about themselves.”

Doc shrugged sheepishly. “Well, only so much one can do in two days-“

“They also told me that your plan got them killed,” Peter continued, his expression suddenly MUCH too dark, “That you are paranoid, impatient and childish.”

Dr. McNinja blinked rapidly, then squinted. “Ouch.”

“But who isn’t without flaws?” Peter said, his expression softening again, “They are at the age when they truly realize that nobody is perfect. I only pray that their memory of me will bring them little pain. I also hope that they will stop being little shits.”

Doc cackled at that, then gripped his ribs with a wince. Peter looked at him earnestly.

“One of my children, in particular, has… made a particularly big mistake,” Peter said, “One he will pay for many times over. It is perhaps too high a cost, and I think we both know about what happens to a vampire that has fed.”

Doc nodded grimly. He had tried to give the Pellbrook brothers a new perspective, but he was lying. There was no curing a vampire that had tasted blood.

“But even vampires can be helpful members of society,” Doc said, “I’ve seen it happen.”

“Yes,” Peter said, “And I know my boy has the willpower to push through. I only ask that you give him the guidance that my wife cannot. She is a good woman, but… set in her ways. I think perhaps, what little Peter needs is no longer a mother or father, but a mentor.”

Dr. McNinja frowned. “Ooh, I’m definitely not qualified for that.”

“It’s not about qualifications, Doctor,” Peter said, touching Doc’s shoulder, “It’s about heart.”

Doc averted his gaze. Ugh. Corny line. Worst part was, it was working.

Ariel came in, Blythe in her arms. She had a big smile on her face. Doc had never seen her so relaxed before.

“I know you wanted to give us closure, but holy sh- erm, wow, Peter,” Ariel smirked, “You said you didn’t have much time.”

“I don’t,” Peter said, emulating the smirk, “But I can’t possibly leave without saying goodbye to my daughter, can I?”

Ariel stepped deeper into the chamber, followed by her sons. Blythe started to stir. Her skin was still extremely pale, but her teeth seemed to still be normal. They had time.

Blythe mouthed something Doc couldn’t hear. Peter’s ghost smiled warmly, caressing her cheek.

“She’s beautiful,” the ghost said.

Ariel nodded, eyes wet with tears.

“What’s her name?”

“Blythe,” Ariel mumbled, “After your mother.”

Peter choked up, petting Blythe’s hair. Blythe smiled weakly, her eyes unable to open.

“You were in Mama’s tummy when I last saw you,” Peter said, “I’m glad I finally got to meet you.”

Peter sighed, then looked at something in the distance. “That’s my time.”

“You can’t stay a little longer?” Oswin said, his voice quiet.

Peter shook his head sadly. “But I’m glad I got to say a proper goodbye, after all these years.”

The ghost breathed in deeply, then looked earnestly at his sons.

“Remember, my sons.” Peter was starting to fade, like a picture in the sand washing away under a wave. “You will never be as strong as your mother or your sister. But there is one thing that the Pellbrook men are good for.”

Aldrich and Garrick’s expression grew darker, and Oswin looked away. Peter approached them, grasping their shoulders encouragingly.

“Our heart.”

And with that, Peter’s form washed away in the wind. There was the sound of a deep sigh in the back of Doc’s mind, which he wagered everyone could hear. Ariel started crying again, but did so with a warm smile on her face. The brothers had their arms around each other, and beckoned for their mother to join them. Ariel did so, and they all formed a group hug around Blythe.

Dr. McNinja clapped his hands together.

“Well, now that he’s gone,” Doc chirped, “Do you mind if I desecrate his bones just a little?”

3625 words.

32718 / 10000 words

Dr. McNinja · Oct 21, 2021

EPILOGUE

The Pellbrooks were sitting in Walden’s chamber. They watched with great intensity as Doc started prancing around the chamber, gathering various ingredients. Blythe was laying in Ariel’s lap, and had lost consciousness again.

Still, plenty of time at this point. Doc opened the box containing Peter Sr.’s bones, and drew his sword. He took one small shaving off of the paladin’s femur, and closed the box again.

“Remember to take that back with you when we’re done here,” Doc said to Ariel, who gave him an unamused glance.

Doc dropped the shaving of bone into the bottle of holy water he had earlier. Sanctified water, after all, was better tasting than water that was mixed with mud from Blythe’s motherland. And it would do an even better job, though it could sting a little.

“I thought we needed Peter’s blood for the cure?” Garrick said.

“We did,” Doc chirped as he worked, mixing some antibiotics into the cocktail he was making. He dropped a full egg yolk inside, making the Pellbrooks cringe in disgust. Wait, where was he keeping an egg?

“But Peter ran away,” Aldrich said, “Did he give you a blood sample earlier or something?”

“Or something!” Doc said. He opened Walden’s cabinet of vampiric essence. “We needed his blood because we needed the vampiric essence that’s soaked into it. Specifically, the essence with his signature. It’s like blood types, but toxic and very specific-“

“And this will still work?” Ariel interrupted.

Doc rolled his eyes at Ariel’s bluntness. “Yes, this is preferable actually. I would have needed to distill Peter’s blood, which would have taken a while without the proper equipment. As awful as this whole ordeal is, the cure part is actually much easier than it would’ve been otherwise!”

Dr. McNinja then brought the bottle over to Blythe, stirring its contents furiously. Garrick noticed a hair floating around inside, and recoiled again. Doc looked at Blythe apologetically. Blythe was still unconscious, so Ariel shook her awake.

“Hi,” Blythe said weakly.

“Hi,” Doc replied.

“The doctor made a potion for you, girl,” Ariel said warmly.

“I mixed in some orange juice, but no amount of citrus can cover up how nasty this is gonna taste,” Doc said, “Try not to throw up, okay?”

Blythe nodded. Doc placed the bottle at her mouth, and the girl recoiled from the smell. Ariel kissed the back of her head, and redirected her face to the bottle.

Blythe squeezed her eyes shut as Doc tilted the bottle up. The brave little girl swallowed the potion (with no small amount of difficulty), and looked up at Dr. McNinja.

“Is that it?” Blythe asked.

“Yep, we’re done!” Doc said, “You’re going to be sore and tired for the next two weeks, but everything is going to be completely fine.”

Ariel gave Doc a grateful smile. “What do we say to the doctor, Blythe?”

Blythe licked her lips, and said, “Thank yo- HURGH”

Ariel sealed Blythe’s mouth before she could projectile vomit all over Dr. McNinja. Blythe’s eyes started tearing up, and to Doc’s disgusted surprise, Ariel had caught most of her vomit.

“Did she just throw up the medicine?” Ariel said with concern. She seemed unaffected by the actual vomit in her palm.

“No, her body just rejected the non-edible parts of the potion,” Doc said, “This is a good reaction. It means her body’s alive again to recognize that what she ate was nasty.”

“Yay,” Blythe said, weakly. Ariel waved her hand, and water washed away the vomit on her hand and Blythe’s mouth.

“So,” Aldrich said, “We’re done?”

Doc sighed. “Yep.”

The Pellbrooks all sighed in relief, and Blythe giggled. Wow, she was recovering fast. Tough girl.

Dr. McNinja looked around the dank cave, then at the wilting fae ring where the portal used to be. Ah, right.

“So,” Doc said, “Can I give you guys a ride home?”

***

Thankfully, the car was still where Doc had left it. The boys removed the leaves and brush while Doc and Ariel watched. Blythe was now sleeping soundly in her mother’s arms.

“Peter’s still out there,” Ariel said, face contorted with worry.

Doc looked at her irritably. “I feel we’ve established now that Peter doesn’t mean any harm.”

“I know. His father made me promise to forgive him,” Ariel sighed, “Truth is, I never wanted him dead. I thought there was a monster just using his body. I didn’t know… I didn’t know it was still him.”

Doc shrugged. “Eh, more or less.”

“But I never got to say that to him,” Ariel mused, “He must still think I want to… God, he must hate me.”

Dr. McNinja looked at Ariel earnestly. He thought again about his own mother.

“Listen, I also had a complicated relationship with my own mother,” Doc said, “I never even did anything wrong. Well, I didn’t follow the career they wanted for me, I guess.”

“They wanted you to have a job better than an esteemed doctor?” Ariel said with a smirk.

“Professional killer.”

“O-oh.”

Doc grinned. “My mother was a ninja too. She would… regularly try to kill me, and urged me to do the same to her. I got really close once. Didn’t think twice about whether killing her was wrong, just had the knife and almost had her. She still teases me about it-“

“There’s a point to this story somewhere, right?”

Doc smirked. “I was afraid of my mother. And I’m sure Peter’s afraid of you too. But no matter how much she hurt me - and last time I saw her, she REALLY hurt me - I still loved her.”

Ariel pensively watched her sons work as she listened.

“I’m sure Peter will come home again,” Doc continued, “And you guys can talk about all this.”

“I highly doubt that,” Ariel sighed.

“You never know.”

“No, as in,” Ariel turned to Doc, almost amused, “We live on a garlic farm.”

“Oh!” Doc said, eyebrows raised, “Yes, that makes things… Mm. Yes.”

After a brief pause, Doc said, “I’ll look for him, and get in touch with you if I find him. We can figure out visiting arrangements.”

Ariel nodded. Blythe stirred in her arms as Garrick threw the last branch off of Doc’s windshield. Doc grinned at Garrick and pressed the car key, making the Honda chirp. The boys jumped back in surprise.

“Come on, we’re burning daylight,” Doc said, getting into the driver’s seat, “I’d like to get you guys home by tomorrow night.”

“There’s an inn on the way,” Ariel stated, getting into the backseat, “I can pay for our rooms.”

“Speaking of which, I do need to bill you for my services,” Doc mumbled, “I take cash, just so you know.”

Ariel had a guilty expression as her sons got in the car as well. Aldrich slipped into the front seat, while Garrick and Oswin sat in the back. Doc sighed, gazing into the rearview mirror at Ariel.

“We can work out an arrangement later,” Doc told her.

Ariel averted her gaze. Doc started the car and got onto the road. Oof, this mood was tense now that Doc brought up money. Everyone seemed to feel the same.

“Please don’t fall asleep on me again,” Oswin muttered to Garrick with a teasing grin.

“It’s fine,” Garrick replied, “I’m not tired.”

The two chuckled, while Ariel stared at them, alarmed. Aldrich, seemingly encouraged, pressed the play button on Doc’s speaker. The car suddenly burst forth the majestic but unsubtle sounds of “Tubthumping”. Doc stole a glance at Aldrich, who was smiling at him.

“It’s growing on me,” the teen said, closing his eyes to relax.

Ariel was now staring at Aldrich, a quiet grin on her face. “Who the hell are you and what have you done to my boys?”

Blythe giggled, and Doc allowed himself a smile. He started chanting along with the song.

Hopefully, he had other music in this thing.

***

A week had passed since Doc dropped off the Pellbrooks at their home. Ariel had insisted Doc stayed for tea and cake, and Doc learned that Ariel was a simply horrid baker. Blythe was unable to walk yet, but Doc reassured the family that she would be back to normal in two weeks, perhaps even sooner. Then he decided to just donate the first aid kit he kept in the glove box. Garrick mocked the many band-aids, having never seen them before, but seemed to shut up after Aldrich jokingly placed one on the cut on his cheek.

Ariel admitted that she had no money to speak of, but would always remember what Doc had done for the family. She offered her and her family’s services as hydromancers whenever Doc called. McNinja didn’t foresee any need or desire to fight along mages again, but accepted the offer graciously.

Since then, the clinic had gotten a sudden surge of new patients. Ariel had spread the word, apparently. But now this was getting too much for Doc to handle. He was alone in his office, and with no secretary, people were just barging into his office. The worst time was when one of Doc’s patients had his pants down, and his sister walked in.

Doc rubbed his eyes and stared at the empty receptionist’s desk. It was ten at night, but Doc felt like he’d been working for two days straight. He needed help.

Dunk, dunk, dunk

Doc looked up to see who was knocking. There was a cloaked figure outside the clinic’s main entrance, fist resting against the glass door.

Dr. McNinja opened the door, suppressing a groan.

“Hello,” Doc said, “Is it an emergency?”

“Sort of,” a familiar voice said. Doc’s eyes widened as the cloaked figure pulled back his hood.

“Peter Pellbrook Jr.,” Doc said wistfully, “Long time no see.”

“Hi,” Peter said sheepishly.

Doc crossed his arms. Peter was standing just in front of his door awkwardly.

“I need…” Peter sighed. “I need help.”

Doc didn’t react at all. Peter cleared his throat and continued.

“When Walden had me… you know… he fed me corpses. When I was hungry. But uh… I’d never drunk from a… someone who was… still alive.”

Doc continued to stare at Peter.

“That day, when I drank from Walden,” Peter said, “I feel like… it changed me? My body, I mean. I feel… different.”

Doc nodded. “Drinking the blood from a living victim is often a threshold that a vampire fledgeling crosses when becoming a full vampire.”

Peter winced. “It feels… bad. I tried to stay away from people. I tried drinking from animals. I heard a story that that can work.”

Doc tilted his head. “Some find it helpful.”

“But I can’t-“ Peter flinched, “Whenever I see someone passing by, I just… I get so hungry.”

Peter fidgeted in place. “I don’t want to hurt anyone. M-more than I already did. I… don’t want to be a monster. Is… Is there anything I can do?”

Doc shook his head. “Vampirism at your stage is irreversible. You’re going to have to live with this.”

Peter shuffled his feet. One of his toes almost crossed the threshold into Doc’s office by accident, which seemed to scare Peter.

“Sorry,” he said, “Um, in that case, is there anything that can… make the pain go away?”

“I might know some things,” Doc said, “But I don’t particularly trust vampires. A lot of them have come to me for help, like you. A lot of them tried to help themselves. Now, I can take you out, no problem, but it’s not something I want happening. You get it.”

Peter nodded understandingly.

“Of course,” Peter sighed, “That makes sense.”

“What would you do if I turned you back?”

Peter shuffled uncomfortably, then, for the first time since he showed up, met Doc’s eyes. Despite the feral hunger in his narrow feline irises, Doc could only see a 15-year-old’s plea.

“I’d probably go sit in the woods there,” Peter said, “I’d write a letter for my mother. Then I’d… I’d watch the sun rise. I’d like to see it again.”

Doc clenched his teeth. He should turn Peter away. He should reeaaaally just give him some blood bags and turn him away.

”I think what little Peter needs…” a voice echoed in Doc’s head, ”…is a mentor.”

Doc turned around and glanced at the receptionist’s desk. He squinted for a second, then turned around again.

“Well, sun doesn’t come up for another eight hours,” Doc said, “In the meantime, wanna come inside?”

Peter looked at Doc, eyes impossibly wide with surprise.

“I… don’t understand.”

“Come in,” Doc said, gesturing for Peter to enter.

Peter gingerly placed one toe at the inside of the clinic. Seeing nothing happening, Peter looked up again at Doc before fully entering.

“Why would you…?”

Doc shrugged. “You seem like a good kid, and I need an assistant.”

Peter inspected Doc’s eyes, confused.

“Here’s the deal. I’m going to help you,” Doc said, “Like I said, I know some things that can help with your condition. And in return, you work for me. Oh, um, I know you’ve gotten used to waking up at night, but I’m probably gonna need you most in the daytime, so start adjusting your sleep schedule, please.”

Peter was still paralyzed with confusion. Doc closed the door behind him.

“The windows are tinted so that light comes through, but the UV radiation won’t set you on fire or whatever. And, just in case, I have some really good sunblock lotion in the back. I live on the second floor, and there’s an air mattress lying around somewhere. You can stay here.”

Peter blinked rapidly.

“I can…” Peter swallowed hard, “…stay?”

“Like I said, not for free,” Doc said, leaning on the receptionist’s counter, “But yes.”

Peter swallowed, then actually looked at the desk Doc was leaning on. His eyes widened at the stuff that was on it.

“Is that… Is that a computer?” Peter asked.

Doc nodded. “You know how to use it?”

Peter nodded eagerly, gingerly running his hands over the keyboard. “I read some manuals for fun.”

“Ugh, dork,” Doc snickered, “Alright, let me give you a tour of the place. Like where we keep the blood bags.”

Peter grinned widely and followed Dr. McNinja deeper into the clinic.

2390 words

35108 / 1000 words. FINISHED

V Blood and Water

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

Dr. McNinja

Kills with one hand, heals with the other

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