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"Soooo.....remind me again why we're out here?" For what had to be the twentieth time in half as many hours, Janning voiced the exact same question as he twirled an unlit cigarette in his begloved fingers.
"We're on a job, Ricard," the deep voice of Ivan answered, with a surprising level of the towering man's usual joviality still somehow intact. "Salvage operations at the behest of our dear 'captain'."
"Yeah..." Janning sighed heavily. "I mean I know what we're doing. I mean why are we out here?" He stuck his arm out the window, gesturing vaguely and indistinctly at what could be anything and everything in the dreary landscape. His face twisted into an ugly scowl and he withdrew his hand quickly, shaking it off like something had stuck to it. "This place smells like shit, looks like death, and we've already raked over just about every square inch of it half a dozen times already. What's left for us to salvage out here, man?"
"You're askin' the real questions, there, champ." Llang spoke up, lifting her visor from over her eyes. "Cap's gettin' more pushy every time he sends us back out here though. So we better find something, if we don't wanna get chewed out so bad we empathize with hubba buba."
Ivan let loose a deep, booming laugh, the titanic metal mitt of his left arm slapping the well beside him hard enough to make the entire makeshift shelter rattle and quake, dust filtering down from several cracks in the ceiling.
"DO NOT STRIKE THE BUILDING WITH SUCH RAMPANT MIRTH, MEATBAG." The synthesized, crackling voice of 024 cut sharply through the uneasy sound of shifting stone and steel as the massive bulk of his upper chassis rotated about to level the three-camera'd gaze of his displeased face at the well-dressed behemoth. "I AM NOT PROGRAMMED WITH ORGANIC SALVAGE PROTOCOLS."
"Ah, well, forgive me, forgive me," the old man chortled, letting his arm drop safely to his side. "But you know how I love such accurate and topical humor."
"I KNOW." 024's cameras whirred softly as they each spun in alternating directions, focusing and un-focusing rapidly in sequence. A gesture that had come to be known as the closest he could do to rolling his eyes. "YOUR COMEDIC RITUALS ARE BAFFLING AND INAPPROPRIATE TO PRACTICE IN OUR CURRENT SITUATION."
"Now, now," Llang spoke up again, with a cheeky grin flashing across her face. "I dunno about 'inappropriate'. A little laugh now and then keeps things interesting. Wouldn't want us to get bored out here. Janning might never shut up."
"Love ya too, jack-head," Janning said flatly.
"Ahem." Another voice cut in, as the door to what was probably someone's house -- or maybe particularly large storage shed -- opened. "Gentlemen. And Janning." Alyssa ran her gloved hands through her bedraggled hair, smoothing it out and brushing out a (very nearly literal) handful of dust and bits of debris. "Think I found something that'll make our trip out here worth it. Couldn't get to it on my own, but I tossed a spider close as I could. Think you can get a lock on it and get us some pictures, Llang?"
"Do I 'think' I can? Puh-lease!" The techie rolled her eyes and tugged her visor back down, her lips curling up in a smirk. "Just gimme the spider number and I'll have it running and transmitting in no time."
"I got number one, three and four out sniffing around some places I couldn't get a look at," Alyssa noted, checking her wristcom for a moment. "But I tossed number two at what might be our payday."
"Oh boy, here we go," Janning muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose. "She's about to get all smug and braggy about her mad skills...like anyone with a datajack couldn't slot in a college degree or two these days."
"HER SKILLS ARE THE ONLY PART OF THIS GROUP I TRUST."
"You wound me on a deep conceptual level, twenty-four," Janning whined, sprawling over onto his back like a deflated balloon.
"BE GLAD I CANNOT WOUND YOU ON A PHYSICAL LEVEL, MEATBAG."
"Now, now." Ivan chortled, slowly strolling away from his perch by the wall to lean over Llang's shoulder as she worked. "I must admit, I don't really understand the work you do for us, Llang. But it's quite the wonder to observe."
"Well, I don't blame ya, old man." Llang's face was still split in a wide grin as her hands hovered in the air, fingers splayed, and several gleaming metallic wires sprouted from each fingertip. Sequences of lights flashed over her visor, as the wires moved in a dizzying array to work through the holographic keyboards she used. "This stuff is half way old tech, and half unnecessary flashing lights to look cool," she admitted. "I could probably do my job a lot quicker with more modern hardware and programs, and less flash and glitter, yeah. But hey...sometimes you can't get the 'softs for the most recent stuff, so you gotta homebrew the old scrap to work as best you can. And no reason not to make it look good while you're at it. Get it?"
"Ah, yes." Ivan hefted the colossal prosthetic that replaced his left arm. "I think I do. I suppose there is something to be said for the familiarity and...robustness of the old and familiar."
"Oh boy, are we having a 'bonding moment' now?" Janning swung himself back up into a sitting posture. "Cause I also got some tricks that you can't really—"
"WE DID NOT AUTHORIZE A HEARTFELT GROUP DIALOGUE ON THIS EXCURSION." 024's carefully modulated tone still somehow managed to harbor a tinge of disgust and exasperation.
"....maaaan, but I wanted to brag about what makes me special, too...." Janning whined. "Why do you guys get to do all the—
"Got it!" Llang chimed in. "Putting spider two on display....now!"
"We're on a job, Ricard," the deep voice of Ivan answered, with a surprising level of the towering man's usual joviality still somehow intact. "Salvage operations at the behest of our dear 'captain'."
"Yeah..." Janning sighed heavily. "I mean I know what we're doing. I mean why are we out here?" He stuck his arm out the window, gesturing vaguely and indistinctly at what could be anything and everything in the dreary landscape. His face twisted into an ugly scowl and he withdrew his hand quickly, shaking it off like something had stuck to it. "This place smells like shit, looks like death, and we've already raked over just about every square inch of it half a dozen times already. What's left for us to salvage out here, man?"
"You're askin' the real questions, there, champ." Llang spoke up, lifting her visor from over her eyes. "Cap's gettin' more pushy every time he sends us back out here though. So we better find something, if we don't wanna get chewed out so bad we empathize with hubba buba."
Ivan let loose a deep, booming laugh, the titanic metal mitt of his left arm slapping the well beside him hard enough to make the entire makeshift shelter rattle and quake, dust filtering down from several cracks in the ceiling.
"DO NOT STRIKE THE BUILDING WITH SUCH RAMPANT MIRTH, MEATBAG." The synthesized, crackling voice of 024 cut sharply through the uneasy sound of shifting stone and steel as the massive bulk of his upper chassis rotated about to level the three-camera'd gaze of his displeased face at the well-dressed behemoth. "I AM NOT PROGRAMMED WITH ORGANIC SALVAGE PROTOCOLS."
"Ah, well, forgive me, forgive me," the old man chortled, letting his arm drop safely to his side. "But you know how I love such accurate and topical humor."
"I KNOW." 024's cameras whirred softly as they each spun in alternating directions, focusing and un-focusing rapidly in sequence. A gesture that had come to be known as the closest he could do to rolling his eyes. "YOUR COMEDIC RITUALS ARE BAFFLING AND INAPPROPRIATE TO PRACTICE IN OUR CURRENT SITUATION."
"Now, now," Llang spoke up again, with a cheeky grin flashing across her face. "I dunno about 'inappropriate'. A little laugh now and then keeps things interesting. Wouldn't want us to get bored out here. Janning might never shut up."
"Love ya too, jack-head," Janning said flatly.
"Ahem." Another voice cut in, as the door to what was probably someone's house -- or maybe particularly large storage shed -- opened. "Gentlemen. And Janning." Alyssa ran her gloved hands through her bedraggled hair, smoothing it out and brushing out a (very nearly literal) handful of dust and bits of debris. "Think I found something that'll make our trip out here worth it. Couldn't get to it on my own, but I tossed a spider close as I could. Think you can get a lock on it and get us some pictures, Llang?"
"Do I 'think' I can? Puh-lease!" The techie rolled her eyes and tugged her visor back down, her lips curling up in a smirk. "Just gimme the spider number and I'll have it running and transmitting in no time."
"I got number one, three and four out sniffing around some places I couldn't get a look at," Alyssa noted, checking her wristcom for a moment. "But I tossed number two at what might be our payday."
"Oh boy, here we go," Janning muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose. "She's about to get all smug and braggy about her mad skills...like anyone with a datajack couldn't slot in a college degree or two these days."
"HER SKILLS ARE THE ONLY PART OF THIS GROUP I TRUST."
"You wound me on a deep conceptual level, twenty-four," Janning whined, sprawling over onto his back like a deflated balloon.
"BE GLAD I CANNOT WOUND YOU ON A PHYSICAL LEVEL, MEATBAG."
"Now, now." Ivan chortled, slowly strolling away from his perch by the wall to lean over Llang's shoulder as she worked. "I must admit, I don't really understand the work you do for us, Llang. But it's quite the wonder to observe."
"Well, I don't blame ya, old man." Llang's face was still split in a wide grin as her hands hovered in the air, fingers splayed, and several gleaming metallic wires sprouted from each fingertip. Sequences of lights flashed over her visor, as the wires moved in a dizzying array to work through the holographic keyboards she used. "This stuff is half way old tech, and half unnecessary flashing lights to look cool," she admitted. "I could probably do my job a lot quicker with more modern hardware and programs, and less flash and glitter, yeah. But hey...sometimes you can't get the 'softs for the most recent stuff, so you gotta homebrew the old scrap to work as best you can. And no reason not to make it look good while you're at it. Get it?"
"Ah, yes." Ivan hefted the colossal prosthetic that replaced his left arm. "I think I do. I suppose there is something to be said for the familiarity and...robustness of the old and familiar."
"Oh boy, are we having a 'bonding moment' now?" Janning swung himself back up into a sitting posture. "Cause I also got some tricks that you can't really—"
"WE DID NOT AUTHORIZE A HEARTFELT GROUP DIALOGUE ON THIS EXCURSION." 024's carefully modulated tone still somehow managed to harbor a tinge of disgust and exasperation.
"....maaaan, but I wanted to brag about what makes me special, too...." Janning whined. "Why do you guys get to do all the—
"Got it!" Llang chimed in. "Putting spider two on display....now!"
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